


Race You to Midnight

by AmaraBliss



Category: The Flash (Comics), The Flash (TV 2014), The Flash (TV 2014) RPF, The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Gen, Other, PTSD, Reader Insert, Romance, Sequel to Break, The Flash Reader Insert, flash imagine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-09-08
Packaged: 2018-08-08 15:10:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 22,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7762666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmaraBliss/pseuds/AmaraBliss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to Break (Barry Allen/Reader) How will you and Barry react after the sudden break from each other. Things are tense as you face off against the big bads in the world.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

(Sequel to Break… short sweet intro…)

Oliver sat in the new and improved base of operations. Felicity had out done herself again. He smiled thinking about the ring he carefully stored away and sighed at the fact that he knew he had to wait.

“Mayor Oliver Queen…” He stood up quickly turning around to face the intruder. Your hands were raised in surrender as his alarm shifted to surprise, “its got a nice ring to it.”

“Y/N, what are you doing here? I thought for sure you would be off to see Barry, now that you’re back in the states.” He watched you step into the light and his mouth dropped open, “What happened to you?”

You shrugged, “I finally got laid off with a nice severance package.”

“You know I meant the bruises on your face… Did they even offer to stitch you up on the way out?” He took to by the arm gently guiding you to a seat as you made laughing noise in your throat to his comment, “Your lip is going to need stitches.”

You nodded as he walked away to get the med kit, “Oliver… I screwed up…”

“I’m sure it’s not that bad…” He said coming back to you, “You knew they planned on letting you go after you got permission for taking out Tanner. You just didn’t know when.”

“Not about that…” You looked up at him, “I lost him, Oliver… I had to leave after I sent him to Nanda Parbat…he asked me to stay. But I had to go…I didn’t have a choice…I lost him for good.”

That was months ago. He frowned watching the tears form in your eyes. He hadn’t realized that the mission would keep you from home so long, “Y/N…”

You looked up at him tears washing the dirt from your face and tried to force a smile, “I don’t have anywhere to go…”

He knelt down taking out an alcohol swab and began cleaning your cut lip, “You’re always welcomed here. Not just for your skills, but because you’re my friend…”

He pulled you into a strong embrace letting you shake. Coming home was hard enough for most soldiers… He could only imagine what you had saw…


	2. Race You to Midnight - 2

You sat spinning in Felicity’s chair in the base. Everyone was out doing the ‘night job’ while you sat waiting Felicity. You had joined the team so to speak, under Oliver’s blessing.

Everyone was very welcoming. They liked your access to things and information. You may not be part of the legit team anymore, but you still had a lot of friends in special places.

Thea had particular grown attached to you. You liked the little Queen. She had a lot of spunk and quirks. You’d been helping her with her ‘rage’ issues as much as you could. Focus was key, but it would never be enough.

You stayed out of the fighting and helped Felicity with running the ops, mostly because you didn’t have a super suit.

“Coffee time!” You heard Felicity shout as she came off the elevator. You smiled standing up from her chair, “Am I late?”

“Nope they aren’t their yet.” You smiled taking your cup from her, “I really like having an espresso machine upstairs.”

“I know right!” Felicity smiled putting in her ear wig.

“You know what?” Oliver spoke clearly.

“That our espresso machine was a worthwhile investment.” She told him smiling, “Everything is set and in position.”

“Everyone is in position, let’s do this.” Oliver said as you took a seat.

“Arrow, just remember that the magnet has a delay.” You told him pulling up a schematic of the ARGUS building.

“I’m aware…” He muttered.

“You weren’t very aware when she shot you with a rubber bullet earlier.” Thea broke into the conversation.

You smirked as he spoke, “Not helpful.”

The op was simple enough. Go to ARGUS base…stop ghost…come home. Rarely did anything go smoothly with this group.

“Oliver!” You shouted standing up watching his vitals begin to spike. You were trying to find a cause anything. You started hacking into the buildings security footage like Felicity taught you.

You could hear Felicity calling out them trying to get an answer. Your mouth dropped open when the footage started feeding through. You stared at the screen, “Felicity they’re fine.”

“You got in?” She came over to you, “What’s happening?”

You used the keyboard to scroll the footage back. You pressed play showing Oliver being held up Darhk dying only to be swished away by a yellow light. Felicity let out a sigh of relief and looked at you. You stood up, “I uh…I should go…”

“Y/N, you’re part of the team now. You don’t have to go. Barry will understand.” Felicity looked at you, “Please stay. If Barry is here…”

“He needs help.” You sighed and nodded, “Fine, but…”

“I get it.” She stood up looking at you, “If he picks a fight no speed force is going stop me from kicking his ass.”

“I’m not worried about picking a fight…I deserve whatever he does.” You told her a sad smile showing up on your face, “I just don’t want to hurt him again.”

“So don’t.” Felicity smiled at you, “Be his friend. Friends are good…look were friendship took Oliver and I. You know how rocky it was for us.”

She turned going back to the computer as Oliver started talking saying they were on the way back. It had been almost eight months since you’d seen Barry at STAR Labs. You hated yourself for a long time and everything that happened while you were away did haunt you the way that did.

You couldn’t stop moving. You had become so nervous and nothing Felicity was saying was helping. Then the ping of the elevator was heard and your mouth went dry. You stood where you were in the shadows.

“Wow…” You could hear Barry saying how nice everything looked. Followed by a brief conversation with Felicity. You took the moment to step forward watching him. He looked good…he looked better than good. That smile…those eyes…

“Hey, Y/N, can you help me my jacket is getting stuck on my quiver.” You were brought out of your thoughts as Thea called for you. You glanced over at Barry as you crossed across the platform to her.

His mouth opened slightly as if he wanted to say something, but all he did was stare at you as you walked by.

Oliver took a deep breath watching you then looked at Barry, “We need to talk about that…”

“Why?” Barry whispered to him, “She made a choice. It’s fine.”

“Barry…it’s not that simple.” Oliver started but was interrupted by Cisco yelling about things he really didn’t understand.

You reached Thea and undid the back latch on her quiver, “There you go.”

“Thanks.” She smiled at you, “So…apparently we now the Flash.”

“Yeah…for a while.” You smiled at her enthusiasm.

She stared at you, “I’m sensing that there is more to that statement. You knew him before this?”

“I…we have a long history. Maybe if I had a drink I’d tell you.” You told her the pain apparent in your eyes.

“Hey…” She frowned taking your hands, “Did he hurt you?”

You smiled giving her hands a squeeze, “Quite the opposite Thea. I hurt him, deeply.”

She stared at you as you walked away to join the conversation with the others. Thea’s eyes drifted to Barry who kept stealing glances at you. It was obvious that you and he were drawn together but you were both fighting it.

“Hey….hey…lets go home. We can all have some drinks! With friends!” Felicity said as Thea came up next to you.

Thea smiled and nudged you, “I guess you can give me that history lesson.”

You watched her walk away before looking over to Barry again. His arms were crossed as he stared at you. You took a deep breath stepping toward him, “Hey…”

“Hi.” He said dryly as he still presented himself closed off to you.

“There’s a place for your suit. Do you need a change of clothes?” You asked him closing your hands nervously.

“No, Cisco brought some with him for me.” He told you letting his hands fall, “I should change.”

“Right. Of course.” You nodded as he passed by you. That was much harder then you expected. You had never seen him so cold before.

“Y/N…” You jumped a little hearing Oliver say your name. He put a hand on your back, “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine…I will be fine.” You lied to him forcing a smile, “Let’s just help him, the best we can.”

“I will talk to him.” He told you, “I will at least make him understand that it was out of your control.”

“No…if anyone talks to him it will be me and under his conditions.” You touched his arm, “He’s still angry…he’ll come to me when he wants answers. I’ll meet you at your place, do need me to pick anything up?”

“No…we should be good.” Oliver sighed watching you turn going to the elevator alone. He looking over to Thea who was pretty much ready to go, “Speedy…”

“Yes?” She looked at him connecting a bracelet.

“I have a job for you…you’re going to like it.”


	3. Race You to Midnight - 3

You sat on the counter in the kitchen drink already in hand as everyone started coming in. You smiled as Thea raced over to you. You’d been getting non-stop texts from her about how she desperately needed to talk to you. You held up a drink as she stopped in front of you, “What’s up?”

“You’re going to hate me for this.” Thea took the drink, “But I want to know what happened between you and Barry.”

Your eyes moved away from her instinctively finding Barry walking in with Oliver and Cisco. You sighed, “It’s complicated…long and complicated. You don’t want to hear about that.”

“Yes I do!” She hopped up next to you, “You’re my friend and you’re hurting…You shouldn’t have to go through this alone.”

You smiled a little, “I’m okay, I promise.”

“Yeah…and I’m a tiger.” Thea nudged you with her elbow getting you to smile for real for a moment.

“Alright kung fu panda…” You rolled your eyes smirking knowing she wasn’t going to let it go, “You better find another bottle…it’s a long story.”

Barry watched you and Oliver’s sister walked out to the balcony. His nose flared as he took a breath in looking away. Oliver looked at him sighing sadly, “Barry, we need to talk.”

“No,” He shook his head, “no we don’t.”

“Yes we do.” Oliver stepped close to him, “A lot happened a while back and you need to understand that it’s not her fault.”

Barry looked at him, “You don’t know what happened between her and I, and I don’t want you to. I’ve moved on. I have wonderful woman in my life now. Someone who wants to be with me.”

Oliver stared at him for a moment, “Just…promise me that you’ll take it easy on her and that you’ll talk her. She’s been through enough.”

Barry’s mouth opened a little as Oliver turned from him walking away. He sighed looking out to the balcony seeing you talking to Thea. You were smiling, laughing about something, but your eyes told a different story. So sad and hurt.

He sighed feeling his anger melt away. He never let go of you. He wasn’t kidding anyone when he said he had. His head shot up feeling a hand on his arm.

Felicity smiled at him, “Are you okay?”

“I don’t know.” He smiled a little letting out a small laugh, “There’s a crazy guy, who is apparently really old, chasing my friend's girlfriend and then there’s…well…I guess I didn’t expect to see Y/N here…”

“She’s only been here a couple months.” She looked at him frowning as she crossed her arms, “And they’ve been rough.”

Twice now they alluded to him that you had been through something. Felicity smiled a little watching his face move from confused and distressed to concern as he asked, “What happened?”

Felicity frowned a little, “I…I can only tell you what has happened since she’s been with us.”

“Why?” He crossed his arms watching her.

“Because she only talks to Oliver about what happened before that.” She told him, “She showed up one night, beat up pretty badly, ended up being way worse than we thought. After patching her up she started helping us, but…there are times that she’s not okay.”

“I don’t understand.” He said in a hushed tone, “By not okay, what do you mean?”

“Well…no one talks about it really, except for Diggle and me…but we think she might be experiencing post-traumatic stress disorder. She has all the signs and triggers…” Felicity told him, “But we’re not sure…she could just be re-acclimating. Regardless we’re all worried about her, which is why we don’t let her on the streets much. She thinks it’s because she doesn’t have a super suit…”

Barry couldn’t help but let out a half laugh before he glanced back at you. You were looking down at the street below. Were those tears on your face as Thea rubbed your back?

Felicity watched him for a moment long until her buzzer went off, “Oh! My pigs in a blanket!”

He smiled watching her walk off as Oliver came back over with a drink for him, “Thank you.”

“Of course.” Oliver smiled glancing over at Felicity.

“You seem really happy.” Barry watched him as he lifted his drink to his mouth.

“I am.” Oliver looked back at him, “Before I met Felicity I didn’t think I could have this…”

“I thought you said we couldn’t have that…” Barry raised his eyebrows.

Oliver smiled patting him on his arm, “I was wrong.”

Barry rolled his eyes as he walked away. He paused lifting his drink to his mouth when he saw Oliver hug his sister. He took a deep breath as he walked toward the balcony. He stopped when he saw you looking out over Star City.

He swallowed stepping out finally, “Hey…”

You looked at him startled. You felt your hands wrap around the guardrail, “Hi.”

“What you drinking?” He asked awkwardly trying to get past this weird phase.

You glanced back at your drink on the balcony’s table, “Scotch…but not by choice. Thea apparently thought I needed something hard tonight.”

He nodded looking at you tapping his fingers against his glass. You sighed looking away from him, “Barry, you don’t have to talk to me. Don’t let them make you feel like you have to.”

“They didn’t.” You looked back at him surprised, “I’m not going to lie though, looking at you hurts. I honestly didn’t think I’d see you again…But you’re here and part of their team, so we’re going to work together. I want it to be as easy as possible.”

He watched you bite your lower lip staring at him for a moment before you smiled, “Barry, I just want you to be happy. Work is work. I will always be able to work for you and with you without a problem. Outside of it…like right now…”

“I can’t.” He swallowed looking away from you as he spoke, “I don’t want to be friends, Y/N. I just thought we should get that cleared up.”

You swallowed and nodded as you took a deep breath to stop the tears from coming. You hadn’t realized that it would be so hard to hear him say something like that, “I understand.”

He glanced back at you, “Good.”

“Great. We’re done…” You turned grabbing your glass and the bottle as you walked inside. Maybe you were going to need this tonight.


	4. Race You to Midnight - 4

Oliver looked back at you as Felicity was driving. He frowned watching your eyes twitch under your eyelids, hands balling up into fist as you slept in the back seat. He reached back touching your knee causing your to jerk awake hands flying up as if to defend yourself, “Hey…it’s okay. You’re here, you’re safe.”

You exhaled slowly, “I’m sorry.”

“You’re fine.” He smiled a little though his concern was still evident, “Still getting the dreams?”

You sighed looking at him, “I said I’m fine, Oliver.”

“But you’re not…we’ve talked about this…” He turned some more to look at you better.

“Yes we have, and when it is a more appropriate time, for instance when we’re not chasing an ancient immortal, we can discuss it further.” You told him looking out the window.

“I need you at 100%.” He stared at you, “Are you? I know you talked to Barry last night.”

“Enough.” Felicity looked at him, “Whatever they talked about is for them…”

You glanced at Felicity staring at you in the rearview mirror and smiled as Oliver turned back in his seat, “I assure you, Barry and I have come to an understanding. One that will get us both through this.”

“Good…good.” Oliver nodded drumming his fingers on his arm rest.

“Oh my god…do not start again.” Felicity grumbled.

“Well…we could have been there already if I was driving.” They both started bickering. You understood why Thea wanted to be in the van with everyone else now.

Once they pulled into the driveway everyone started to unload. You looked at Oliver, “I’m going to establish a perimeter.”

He nodded and filed inside with everyone else, while you started around the edge of the house. He knew it would put you at ease after the episode in the car. Sure you were out in the country, but from the porch you could easily see three bad spots. You started walking up the driveway scanning the area. When you were about halfway down you felt a familiar swoosh past you.

Through a smile you choked back the tears, “Always late…”

Later you checked in with everyone. Oliver had ran out for something and handed out tasks to everyone. You ended up helping Laurel look into some leads about Savage when Cisco approached you, “Hey…”

You looked at him, “Hi…what’s up? You have ‘thinking’ face…”

He smiled a little breaking the tension, “I know you and Barry are in a…rough stage, but I was hoping you could still help me.”

“Cisco…” You could feel a stinging sensation in your chest at the mention of Barry, “Just because Barry and I are not together and things are different does not mean we aren’t friends. What can I do?”

“This…Carter…that’s hanging around Kendra…” He made a face of annoyance, “I don’t like him…I don’t trust him, so I was thinking maybe you could just…I don’t know hang around them and make sure he’s not an asshole.”

You half laughed, “Sure, Laurel you’ve got this right?”

“Yeah, I’m going to grab Diggle to see if our ARGUS connections can help us.” She told you as you walked out with Cisco.

You stopped on the porch and looked at him, “It would probably be better if I went alone. Might seem a bit obvious if you’re with me.”

“Right, no, good idea.” He nodded slowly as he watched you go, “Go gett’um…”

You walked out toward them with no intention of looking into the two newbies. You had talked to Carter enough to know that he was being sincere, even if he was a little rough in the delivery. You smiled passing them, “Mind if I take a nap nearby? I’ve been told to ‘watch’ you.”

“By who?” Kendra seemed more upset about it then Carter.

“People who care about you.” You told her stopping for a moment, “Be happy, he just wants you taken care of.”

Kendra sighed looking down before looking at Carter. He smiled a little stepping toward you, “Do you need a pillow?”

You stopped watching him take off his jacket, “I’m okay, your majesty.”

You saw him smirk as you went a few paces away near the barn and climbed up onto a hay bale. You hadn’t really slept since Barry showed back up and if was effecting you. Everyone said it was a natural response, but he wasn’t what was keeping you up. You wish he was.

Instead you were having nightmares about your last assignment. You couldn’t escape it no matter how many times you went over it with Oliver, or how many sessions you went to for therapy. It haunted you and kept you tethered to your past, something you desperately wanted to run from.

_“Boss! Oh god…what happened?” You looked down at the little girl in your arms and back up to your approaching men. You weren’t fast enough, “Shit…we have to go…you have to leave her!”_

“Y/N!” Your eyes snapped open gun raised at Barry. He raised his hands surprised by the reaction, “Whoa…whoa!”

“Barry…” You let out a labored sigh letting the gun fall to your side as your free hand went to your face, “…sorry…I’m sorry…”

Barry stood a few paces away looking at you. He had just watched the world get destroyed and relived the last few hours, “We couldn’t find you…Carter said he last saw you here. You okay?”

You looked at him for a moment as you collected yourself, “I’m getting there…what happened?”

“Nothing…we just were having a meeting. We just got done meeting with Savage.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and shifted on the balls of his feet. A habit he exhibited when he was unsure of things.

“Barry…” You stood up holstering your weapon, “I know you said we’re done…but there is a part of me that will never let go of you. It’s the same part that knows that you’re scared.”

He looked at you as you went on, “I told myself that when I got back to the states, I was going to find you and explain myself…the mission was only supposed to be a couple of weeks, but it went south. It became months and I came home broken. You have the same look I did, before I walked off the plane in Star City. Not sure if you’re doing the right thing.”

He sighed wiping a hand over his face, “Yeah…that’s exactly what I’m thinking.”

“Barry…talk to me.” You touched his arm concern lacing your features, “I know you said you couldn’t be my friend, but I didn’t say that. I want you in my life…even if it’s only as a friend.”

He looked down into your eyes, “I only said that because…well…I’m me and I react fast. I don’t always think things through…I traveled back in time…I’ve done today before.”

You looked at him surprised as he relayed the events to you. By the time he was done you were both sitting on the hay bale, “In those moments as I was running away from Oliver…These things kept racing into my mind. I never said goodbye to my dad…or Iris, or Joe, or Patty…you.”

“Me?” You sat up at little surprised.

“Yes.” He nodded looking away from you, “Y/N, as angry as I am with you for leaving me that day. I always found some excuse for you and turns out you have a big one. As I was running I realized that I didn’t want to leave this world without fixing things with you. I didn’t want you to leave this world thinking that I hated you.”

“I wouldn’t blame you…what I did wasn’t right…or fair.” You felt your cheeks flush as he looked at you, “I should’ve found a way to contact you.”

He smiled a little, “Y/N, I’m trying to find a way to apologize for being such a dick the other night and you’re kind of spoiling it because you’re apologizing for something way above both of our paygrades…”

You laughed a little, “Yeah, well I always have had to up you one. Remember that one time in Ms. Jenkins’ class…”

“The Volcano incident, I think the room still has scorch marks.” He smirked a little. How easily you both fell back into each other, he missed this, “Y/N, this…isn’t going to be something like before…”

“I know.” You nodded, “What I hear from Felicity is that you have a pretty amazing girlfriend. I’m happy for you. That’s all I ever want, is for you to be happy.”

He nodded slowly letting silence fall between the two of you. He finally took a deep breath, “I gotta know though…are you just going to leave again?”

You frowned looking at him, “Barry, I’m out of that game. I’m done with it all…”

He tilted his head as if he didn’t believe you, “Really?”

You sighed looking at your hands, “I…anticipated this conversation. I don’t expect you to believe me. After all, I did lie to you a lot and then leaving without explanation…what I mean to say is…”

“Yes?” He waited patiently for you to finish.

You looked him in the eyes, “I told myself if I ever met you again…if we ever came into each other’s lives I would never lie to you. I promise you that, Barry. I never want to hurt you like I did again.”

He looked at you for a moment smiling, “That’s a bit…extreme.”

“I mean it.” You told him, “Go ahead, ask me something.”

He half laughed before he realized that you were serious, “Oh…alright. Um, what’s your favorite color?”

“Come on…that’s easy…try again.” You smirked at him.

“Fine…” You can see him taking on the challenge, “In high school, freshman year, we went on a trip to the museum of history. Someone put gum in Iris’ hair…”

“Becky Cooper.” You smirked, “It was Becky Cooper. She secretly hated Iris because she lived with you. Also easy and obvious when you think about it.”

You both laughed for a moment before he looked at you. You could tell he was going to ask you something serious, “That night…would you have stayed?”

You shut your eyes taking a deep breath, “In a heartbeat.”

He smiled a little before clearing his throat, “Right…”

“We should probably…” You stood up, “They might be worried.”

“Yeah…crap, I forgot all about them.” He stood up looking at you running a hand through his hair, “Strange how easily we forget the world could be ending.”

“Yeah, when you’re in good company time stands still.” You smiled at him reaching up adjusting his collar before you turned walking toward the house.

He stood there a moment as the tips of his ears began to burn. He swallowed licking his lips as he started after you when you looked back waving for him to catch up. He still had so many questions for you, but he would have to wait to ask them until Savage was dealt with.


	5. Race You to Midnight - 5

You leaned against your apartment elevators wall. You’d just gotten done with your new shrink. You liked her. She made more sense than the other three and realized that there were things you just weren’t going to share with her.

There was a groaning noise as the elevator moved. It set your cells on fire making your heart begin to race. Your hand gripped the railing as you shut your eyes. It felt like the walls enclosing around you.

As the voices started to reach your ears the ping of the doors gave you hope. It was still a long walk to your apartment. Your vision started to blur as you walked down the hall.

“1…”

_“Why didn’t you save me?”_

“2…” You said pulling out your keys with shaky hands.

_“You had one job…”_

“…3” You struggled with the lock for a moment. Once inside you shut the door leaning against it taking in deep breaths, “4…5…6…”

“Bad day?” Relief flooded your system at the sound Barry’s voice. Your eyes snapped open seeing him standing near your couch. Something was wrong.

“Barry, what happened?” You dropped your bag walking over to him.

He gave you a sad smile as he teared up, “I shouldn’t have come…I’m sorry. You’re having…”

“Barry…” You put both your hands on his arms, “what happened?”

He hung his head, “Patty and I…I…we’re not…”

You frowned hugging him tightly for a moment before you felt his arms wrap around you, “I’m so sorry, Barry.”

“I screwed up…” He buried his face into your neck.

You pulled away looking at him, “Sit.”

He did as told and watched you walk over to you phone dialing out, “You had plans? I can go…”

“Sit.” You pointed at him, “Hey Tim, yeah…yeah it’s not as bad but…bad enough that I also need mint chocolate chip too. Thank you.”

“What was that?” He asked as you sat down next to him.

“The doorman.” You smiled at him, “We went out a couple times, found out we were better as friends. He knows I have a hard time going out though, so he helps me out.”

“That’s nice of him.” He looked down at his hands.

“Tell me what happened.” You reached over taking his hand in yours. You’d seen him a few weeks ago for New Years, but have been so busy since you hadn’t had your normal talks you had started since amending things.

He told you about the Turtle and trying to tell Patty the truth. How she was deciding to leave and go back to Midway. You were only interrupted for a moment when Tim stopped by with whiskey and ice cream. You thanked him and tipped him well before coming back to Barry.

Barry pushed his spoon back into the carton looking at you, “And…then ran here and waited sulking on your couch.”

You smiled a little, “Mi casa es su casa. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Thank you.” He smiled at little, “It seems you know how to make me feel better.”

“I have been through a few break ups.” You told him waving your spoon around, “No matter what ice cream always makes it better.”

“And the whiskey?” He glanced over at the bottle.

You looked at it resting on your coffee table, “That…is for something entirely different.”

“The counting…” He frowned looking back at you, “Things aren’t getting better?”

“Well I have a better therapist now. She is willing to let me be on some topics, but almost knows when to push me on the right ones.” You told him, “But no…things have been rough lately and with everything with Oliver and Dhark…”

“Can I do anything?” He looked you in the eyes, “I hate seeing you like that. Like the world is crashing in on you.”

That’s exactly what it was like to. The entire world stopped and rushed forward from single moments of your past pushing them over like a wave making you drown. You looked away from him putting the spoon in the carton, “I don’t want to burden you with this stuff. It’s…not pleasant.”

“Hey…” You looked at him when his hand fell on your knee, “I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want to know…if I didn’t think I could handle it.”

You took a deep breath shaking your head, “It took me a long time to admit I am…broken…and I’m still struggling with the fact that I will probably never not have nightmares about what happened. That even though I did everything right…”

He moved the ice cream to coffee table moving closer to you. His arms wrapped around you as you started to cry.

“I was assigned to retrieve a little girl…important someone’s daughter. We got her out easily enough, but…it went south when we tried to get over the borders.” You rested your head against his shoulder as he rubbed your back, “We had to hide in a village. My guys worked to get us through while I stayed with her. She was terrified and I was doing everything I could to keep her calm…it wasn’t enough…”

You pushed away from him standing up wiping a hand over your face, “Barry, she died in my arms and I lost to men taking out the people who did it…”

He frowned, “I’m so sorry.”

You crossed your arms and looked at him, “I see her sometimes…haunting me. I know she’s not there. I know it’s just my guilt of not being able to get her home, but it cripples me.”

He watched you reach down to the bottle of whiskey, “It won’t stop it.”

“I know…but at least I’ll get some sleep.” You told him staring at the bottle, “I’m trying…”

He stood up taking the bottle setting it down, “I never doubted you. I just…every therapist…”

“I know. She already has told me to try something different.” You looked at him, “And I’ll get there, but tonight I think we both need a drink. Let’s wallow together and watch an awful movie.”

He smiled a little, “I’ll find a movie.”

“I’ll get the glasses.” You winked walking toward the kitchen. You walked away hearing the TV pop on. Once in the kitchen you reached into the cupboard grabbing to cups. You took a deep breath when you saw your hands shaking.

You cursed silently going to the sink turning on the water and splashing it on your face.

“Everything alright?” You heard him in the other room.

“Yeah, looking for something to snack on.” You told him opening another cupboard grabbing a bag of chips. You came back out with everything plopping down on the couch, “What’s our poison?”

He smirked leaning back, “Classic, ‘The Shadow’”

You laughed, “Oh my gosh it’s been ages! What’s that one line we’d say back to each other all the time…Uh… ‘The sun is shining’

“‘But the ice is slippery.’” He laughed saying the last bit with you, “You know this movie isn’t half bad though. It has promise.”

“Had promise. I doubt they’ll redo it.” You opened the chips offering them to him.

“You never know, they just redid Point Break.” He smiled a little putting his arm around your shoulders as he reached into the bag, “If it has the potential to make money they’ll redo anything.”

“I suppose you’re right.” You smiled enjoying the warmth seeping into your soldiers. It wasn’t long before you were drifting off to sleep the bottle untouched.

_“Why couldn’t you save me!?”_

You jerked awake feeling two strong hands on your arms, “Y/N!”

“Barry…” You held onto his arms, “…sorry…”

“Don’t be…” He was kneeling in front of you, “I think me moving startled you.”

“No, Barry, this is normal.” You told him taking a deep breath glancing at the clock behind him, “Oh wow…”

“Yeah we both fell asleep.” He smiled a little, “I was just about to head home.”

“You can stay. Get some sleep.” You smiled at him taking his hands, “You can stay as long as you need to.”

He smiled, “While I appreciate it, I have work. Break ups don’t fall under the days off categories.”

You blushed when he kissed your forehead walking for the door, “Later Barry.”

He glanced back winking at you, “I’ll call you.”


	6. Race You to Midnight - 6

You smiled at Oliver and Felicity at your table, in your small apartment, “You guys really didn’t have to bring me dinner…”

“Of course we did!” Felicity looked at you with a smile. Not even the loss of her legs and the world going topsy turvy on her would get her from be wonderful, “You’re our friend and we know that things are changing for you.”

“Oh come on…” You shook your head putting your napkin on your plate, “I’ve been seeing a new doctor. Not moving or something like that.”

Oliver smiled taking Felicity’s hand in his, “You know what we mean. We really appreciate everything you’ve been doing and we know how hard it gets.”

You sighed looking down at your plate again, “Thank you, it’s nice to know and thank you for the amazing meal.”

“Well you got to stop eating Chinese takeout sometime right?” Oliver smiled standing up clearing the plates

“Oliver Queen, you better not be doing my dishes…” You yelled after him, “I will not let you and you know I can stop you!”

“I am well aware.” He told you walking away, “I am simply putting them in the sink and wrapping up the left overs.”

You laughed knowing full well that wasn’t true. You looked at Felicity staring at you, “What?”

“You seem happier.” She smiled a little.

“I…am.” You told her, “Things have been better lately. I think Dr. Austin is working with me in a different way. She gives me space but…still is pushy.”

“Oliver said you might be getting a puppy.” Her eyes twinkled, “Is that true? Please say it’s true. I want a puppy at the base.”

“You know Thea said the same thing.” You laughed a little, “I have been thinking about it. Doc said it would be really beneficial.”

“But the news of a dog and a new doctor isn’t what’s making you smile more, is it?” She stared at you intently.

“What do you mean?” You crossed your arms looking at her.

“Barry, came by to see me.” She smiled more, “He might’ve said that you helped him with his unfortunate break up.”

You rolled your eyes, “There’s nothing there, Felicity. We’re just friends.”

“Mmhmm…” She smiled more, “we’ll see.”

“Felicity…” You stopped hearing a knock at the door. You sighed looking at her, “What did you invite the Diggle clan over too?”

“No…” She pushed back in her chair watching you walk for the door.

You weren’t expecting anyone either. You peered through the peep hole seeing Barry on the other side. You stepped away from the door a little looking back at Felicity whispering, “Its Barry…”

“I told you!” She smirked pointing at you.

“Told her what.” Oliver looked at the both of you.

“That we are leaving…right now.” Felicity looked up at him then to you, “You should get the door, Y/N.”

You sighed eyeing her suspiciously. It was awfully convenient that they were talking about him then he shows up. You opened the door, “Barry?”

“Hey.” He smiled at you. He was holding flowers and a brown bag, “I know I said I would call, but I thought I would surprise you…but it looks like I’m actually interrupting.”

Oliver was pushing Felicity toward the door. He reached forward shaking Barry’s hand, “We were actually just getting ready to go.”

Barry frowned, “Seriously guys if I’m interrupting…”

“No, Barry, you’re not.” Felicity smiled at him waving him down for a hug, “It’s good to see you, you need to visit more often.”

“Yeah, Barry, maybe next time we can all do dinner together.” Oliver smiled looking at you.

“That would be great.” Barry nodded letting them out.

“Have a good night guys.” You called after them and let Barry inside. You shut the door taking a deep breath, “Wow, who knew tonight was visitor night.”

“If it’s too much I can go.” He stood there watching you for a moment.

“I’m fine.” You smiled at him. In fact you felt better with him around then you did with Oliver and Felicity, “I’m happy you’re here. I was worried about you.”

“Yeah, no…everything turned out alright.” He smiled, “We ended up ending things well.”

“Good.” You stood there staring at him.

He smiled looking down at the flowers, “Uh…these are for you. Lilies are your favorite right?”

“Yes.” You took them from him smelling them, “Thank you, but why?”

“Pretty flowers for a pretty lady.” You blushed a little as he held up the bag, “I also brought ice cream.”

“You came prepared.” You nodded, “I’ll get some spoons.”

“I’ll get a movie.” He smiled watching you walk off.

You got the kitchen setting the flowers on the counter. You didn’t have a vase or anything like that and felt a little bad just leaving them there as you grabbed the spoons. Shaking it off you walked back out to him, “What are our options?”

“They’re all good movies.” He pouted a little, “James Bond, the original Star Wars, stuff like that.”

“Just pick one, we probably won’t pay attention to it anyways. After all you didn’t just come over to watch a movie did you?” You smirked a little.

“No, I came over to hang out with a friend and eat ice cream with her.” He smiled finally picking something and leaned back into the couch.

“And the ice cream is for what?” You handed him a spoon as he pulled out something with lots of chocolate in the name, “Oh my.”

“We are celebrating.” He smiled taking off the lid, “That fresh beginnings are good for everyone. Me, Patty, and us. To that we need something that taste amazing.”

“Well you did good.” You smiled taking a spoon full taking a bite, “Oh my god…this sinful.”

“You like it.” He asked getting a bite.

You nodded leaning back, “So what really brought you by?”

“I told you…”

“Yeah…you did, but…” You glanced at him watching him sigh, “Barry…”

He looked at you, “I…didn’t want to go home yet and I knew you wouldn’t ask me about what happened with Patty. Everyone has been so uptight since Thawne left…”

“Whoa!” You sat up quickly touching his arm, “He came back? How? Are you okay? Is everyone okay?”

He couldn’t help but laugh, “Everyone is fine, it’s complicated.”

“I got all night.” You told him giving him your full attention, “And leftover chicken parmesan from Oliver.”

It didn’t take much to convince him. He told you everything. Every detail. You sighed when he was finished, “Oh Barry…”

“I’m alright.” He looked at you smiling a little, “Everything turned out alright and everyone is safe and healthy.”

“Good.” You moved the ice cream moving close to him letting your head rest against his shoulder, “I’m thinking of getting a dog.”

“Yeah?” He smiled putting his arm around you, “What kind?”

“I don’t know.” You glanced up at him, “My doctor is recommending it. Not a little one…I think I’d break it.”

“German Shepard? Lab?” He listed off, “There are lots of options.”

“I guess I will have to see.” You smiled at him, “This of course means I’ll have to move.”

“Why would you have to move?” He looked confused.

You smirked, “You can’t have a dog without a backyard.”

“That makes sense.” He started moving his finger on your arm in a circular motion like he used to, “Do you know where you’ll look?”

“Well…” You swallowed, “I kind of already have a house.”

“What?” He looked down at you, “Where is it?”

You took a deep breath looking at him, “In Central City.”

He perked up, “You’re moving back…are you serious?”

“Yeah, is that okay?” You sat up looking at him.

“Are you kidding, this is great! I wish I knew you were looking.” He hugged you tightly, “I would’ve helped you look.”

“That’s the thing.” You smiled, “I have had the house. It’s my house…my parents’ house.”

He looked at you all smiles, “When are you planning on moving?”

“My lease isn’t up yet, but I was hoping by the end of the month. I’ll just pay the land lord a break of lease fee.” You told him, “Unless some certain vigilantes want to use it for something then I might keep it open for them.”

“Do they know?” He asked as you both settled back to your previous positions.

“I think Oliver suspects, but with everything with Darhk and Felicity.” You sighed, “It’s kind of why I’m hesitating. I don’t want to leave until its right, but I have to take care of myself.”

He nodded, “They’ll understand.”

“I know, that’s why it makes it so much harder.” You told him falling silent. This was nice, just listening to his heart beat watching Luke run toward the Millennium Falcon. You missed this a lot, more then you wanted to admit.

You still loved him.


	7. Race You to Midnight - 7

You stood outside on the side walk looking at your old home. You took a deep breath letting it go slowly as you heard a whine. You looked down at a German Shepard puppy tilting his head at you, “Hey this isn’t easy okay, I was kind of hoping I’d have a different emotional support system here with me. Not that you’re bad company…but your cute eyes aren’t going to get me through the door.”

“What about mine?” You looked back at Barry standing in the street, “I’m sorry I’m late, we are dealing with some transitioning at the station and…a whole bunch of stuff we can talk about later once we get you moved in.”

“There really isn’t much to move in, but…” You looked back at the house feeling a little nauseous, “I haven’t been here for ten years…God knows what my aunt did to it.”

“I’m sure nothing awful.” Barry stood next to you, his hands in his pockets staring at the house, “Though I’m pretty sure she installed shag carpeting.”

You both looked down when you heard a whine. You smiled kneeling down petting his head, “I’m okay boy.”

“Who’s this handsome fellow?” Barry knelt down with you putting a hand on the dogs back.

“This is Bandit.” You told him, “He’s my…service dog.”

Barry smiled at you. You could see in his eyes that he was really happy you took the steps to admit that you weren’t always alright, “Bandit?”

“That’s what they named him, it has something to do with his markings looking like a mask.” You smiled scratching under his chin.

“He’s big. Definitely not an ankle biter.” He smiled at you.

“He’s almost seven months old, but was the top of his class. I still have to attend some classes with him too.” You watched Barry rub his ears.

“Is it alright for me to be touching him?” Barry started to move his hand away, “I’m never sure with service animals.”

“You’re fine.” You smiled nodding, “There a different service animals for different things. Bandit is trained to work and not work. When he’s wearing his vest you need to leave him alone.”

Barry watched Bandit look at you, ears twitching as he listened to your voice, “Right now he’s not working.”

“Right.” You nodded, “Technically he’s always working though. He senses my anxiety and helps be get calm again, but at a time like this he’s just my Bandit. It’s different for each case though.”

Barry nodded watching you look at Bandit. He could see how much he helped you already. Just petting him seemed to sooth you, “So…are we going in or what?”

You looked at him as Bandit licked your face. You nodded slowly as you stood up, “Let’s do this.”

You walked forward with Barry struggling with the lock. Finally the familiar click sounded and you pushed the door open. You walked in hearing Bandits nails click around on the hardwood floors, “Definitely, no shag carpet.”

Barry smiled at you as he shut the door, “It really doesn’t look like much has changed at all.”

You walked around looking at the pictures on the wall. Everything was the same. Your aunt may have moved the furniture around, but she kept everything on the walls the same. You sighed staring at a picture of your parents, “So it seems.”

Barry watched Bandit paw at your leg whining, “Everything okay?”

You knelt down to Bandit letting his lick your face, “It’s just…I’m getting all this memories…all at once.”

He walked over kneeling down putting a hand on your back. When you looked at him, he smiled, “If it’s too much you can come stay with me. Take it slow. I don’t want you running off just because it’s a little overwhelming.”

You smiled at him, “Thank you, Barry. I appreciate everything.”

“I know.” He smiled kissing your forehead before standing up, “I’ll go get your stuff while you get reacquainted.”

You stared after him petting Bandits head absently. It wasn’t until he moved his head away that you looked at him, “What?”

He huffed at you and walked away as you stood up, “What? Bandit, don’t you walk away from me like that. It’s totally not what you think! Bandit!”

“Uh…” You looked back at Barry again opening the door, “I just missed something, didn’t I?”

“Well… Maybe a little.” You blushed some, “Bandit’s telling me that I should really move forward with things…”

“Oh? Like what?” He set your duffle down near the stairs.

You knew that promise you made would come to bite you in the ass. You looked down at your hands, “…uh well…with how..iealabowu…”

“What?” He half laughed stepping toward you, “I’m fast, but not fast enough to hear that.”

You took a deep breath and looked at him, “With…how I feel about you.”

He looked at you surprised shrugging and putting his hands into his pockets, “Oh…”

“I know. I know things are different, and I know that me saying this after you just broke up so recently is awful…” You looked at him worried, “I just want to keep my promise to you. I don’t…won’t ever put you through that again.”

Barry watched Bandit walk up to you quickly and start to lick your hand. He hadn’t realized that this caused you such anxiety, “Whoa…hey…stop…”

His hands fell onto your arms gently as you looked up at him, “I won’t lie to you again Barry.”

“I know.” He smiled a little and hugged you tightly, “I know you won’t, and I know you get that I’m going through some stuff and I’m not there. I’m not sure I will be for a while.”

You calmed down as he held you as he talked, “Y/N, I want you to know that I appreciate that you want keep that promise, but I don’t want it cause you trouble.”

“Trouble?” You pulled back looking at him.

“Bandit…It’s hard to say if he was giving you courage or helping you through it. But I can see the anxiety in your eyes still.” He looked at you moving a piece of hair from your face.

You stared at him a moment longer before you smiled, “It needed to be said…”

He smiled stepping back looking at you duffle, “You really didn’t have much did you.”

“I told you. Oliver, thought it would be good to have a safe place to lay low in a bind.” You nodded taking a deep breath trying to clear your mind. He confused you. He said things would be different this time, but they felt the same. He acted distant in his speech to you, but he was so physical. The kissing and the touching.

“Right, well it just means we get to go to your surprise not surprise party sooner.” He gave you a thumbs up, “Once you’re ready.”

“…Caitlin or Iris’ idea?” You groaned a little.

“Both…they both were excited.” He nodded a little, “I hear there’s going to be your favorite Central City selections there.”

You gasped eyes getting wide, “Cake? The cake? Will 'the cake' be there?”

“I believe ‘the Cake’ was mentioned in passing.” He smirked winking at you, “But you won’t know unless you get ready.”

“Well, I better get to it.” You grabbed your bag and started upstairs.

Barry watched you drag the duffle, “Seriously though, take your time we have like two hours…”

You smiled back at him, “Thanks Barry, Bandit watch him he’s a crafty one.”

Barry looked down at Bandit sitting at his feet. His ears were back and his eyes were trained on him, “Uh he’s not going to eat me, is he?”

“I don’t know we haven’t covered that in training yet.” He heard you call down to him.

“Nice boy.” He stepped around him to go to the living room. He wasn’t sure if the dog liked him or not. His eyes just stared at him unblinking following him around the room, “She was joking boy.”

“No I wasn’t!” You called down to him smirking a little as you stepped into the bathroom. Tonight was going to be a good night. You just had to push the memories aside and get to the good.


	8. Race You to Midnight - 8

You smiled at everyone in at Barry’s home. They had done a wonderful little shindig for you. Pizza, cake, and Chinese. What more could a single girl ask for?

Man of her dreams and some wine, maybe?

“I think this is your favorite.” Cisco leaned over the couch with a wonderful white wine, “At least a really fast bird told me that.”

“Aww Cisco, thank you.” You smiled at him. One out of two ain’t so bad.

“It’s good to have you back.” He smiled at you, “Can I get you anything? I’m heading to the kitchen.”

“I am good, thank you.” You watched him walk away. Both he and Barry had practically been waiting on you hand and foot. Barry had kind of always been like that with you, but Cisco…you were sure he wanted something.

“Hey…you alright?” Your head swiveled easily to this new face. Jay Garrick. ‘Kind of wonderful,’ Caitlin said to describe him. You weren’t so sure. If life had taught you anything it was to be wary of the pretty face.

“I’m fine, just…readjusting. The people I was around in Star City are a little more…” You tried to think of a nice way to put it.

“Serious?” Caitlin said walking over to Jay.

“Tense.” Iris added her two cents as she sat down, “And rougher.”

You laughed a little nodding, “Yeah…I was going to say driven, but…yeah all of that too.”

You talked with them for a while before you wine glass was empty. You stood up walking for the kitchen stopping when you heard voices inside, “Have you asked her yet?”

“Cisco…” Barry sounded worried, “She’s just got back…I didn’t want to just ask her to jump universes with us.”

“Barry we leave tomorrow. We need to know.” Cisco told him.

“I know…I just…I already know the answer.” Barry looked at him, “She’s going to say yes because she’d do anything for me…just like I’d do anything for her.”

“Then what’s the problem?” You heard Barry sigh heavily.

“That is the problem, Cisco.” Barry told him, “I just got her back in my life for a third time, and she’s going through a lot right now. I know we need her help, but I don’t know if I can ask her to risk everything…Maybe we can find another way.”

“There’s no time for another way. Zoom doesn’t know about her.” Cisco told him, “She has skills that will be helpful and for once Harry even agreed that this was a good idea. You know that’s got to count for something…”

“Count what?” You found that this was an appropriate entry point. You smiled catching both of them off guard.

Cisco looked at Barry before starting to leave, “Barry, wanted to ask you something.”

“Cisco!” Barry hissed at him as he left the two of you alone. His eyes fell to you as his mouth opened searching for words.

You smiled setting your glass on the counter reaching for the wine bottle, “You don’t have to ask, Barry. You’re right, I’d do anything for you, even go to a different universe.”

“You overheard us?” Barry smiled a little, “Of course you did.”

“It is a good idea though.” You looked at him as you filled your glass, “As much as this version of Harrison Wells will tell you of this place, it’s still going to be surprising. You’re going to be thrown off. I won’t be, well not like you at least.”

“You don’t have to go.” He stepped closer to you, “I know that you’re still dealing with the events that happened.”

“Barry…” You looked at him putting a hand on his arm, “I’m fine…and I’ll go with you.”

He smiled a little looking at you, “Thank you, Y/N.”

“Do you think Caitlin will watch my little shadow?” You glanced back at Bandit who had followed you in here.

“If she won’t, Iris might.” He told you while looking down at Bandit.

You smiled at him as you took a sip of your wine. His eyes moved to yours and he smiled making you blush. You could live a thousand life times and nothing could compare to that smile, “I should probably go ask them.”

“Yeah…probably.” He nodded slowly. You stayed still staring up into his eyes. You could tell he wanted to ask you something, so waited. You would always wait for him, “Y/N…”

“Yes?” You said quietly playing with the stem of you glass waiting for him to continue.

He licked his lips as if he were tasting the words before spoke, “Do you think we would’ve still been together if you’d stay?”

Your heart ached as you shut your eyes. There was a burning sensation in your nose as you kept the tears that came away, “I’d like to think so…”

“Me too…” He whispered pushing a loose strand of hair back in place. He smiled when you opened your eyes.

“Barry…” You started.

“Barry!” You stepped away as Cisco came back into the room. You could feel Barry’s eyes still on you as Cisco continued, “We’re getting some strange readings from the lab. The portals…we…should…”

“Yeah…okay.” He looked over at Cisco finally, “I’ll be right there.”

After Cisco left you smiled, “Ever the hero, Barry Allen.”

“Y/N…” He started to speak but you stopped him.

“Go…I’ll meet you at the lab in the morning. I assume we’re leaving from there.” You looked at him as he nodded, “I’ll be there, I promise.”

He nodded one last time hesitating as he moved to leave. You shut your eyes when he flashed away. What were you doing? You were in no condition to go on something important like this. You rarely went a night without nightmares.

Taking a deep breath you went back out to the living room only seeing Iris. You helped her with the clean up and made some small talk which lead to an agreement of her watching Bandit. You smiled putting the dishes away.

“Barry was really excited to have you come home.” Iris looked at you as she dried a dish handing off to you.

“He was?” You looked at her, “Well, I’m excited to be home…I guess…I needed to get away from the…dark.”

“Is…Barry your light?” Iris smirked when you face flushed, “You can’t deny it. You could try, but you’d fail.”

“Please don’t tell him…” You looked at her frowning.

“Why not?” Iris looked at you with sad eyes, “You two were good for each other. In fact, you are good for each other.”

“And maybe one day we’ll get that chance again, but right now he’s still getting over Patty.” You told her putting the dish away, “People do stupid things when they’re hurt.”

“Loving you is not a stupid thing.” You looked at Iris surprised by her words.

Finding your voice again you looked away, “All the same…”

“He loves you.” You froze again feeling your mouth go dry. You heard her put the dish back down, “Y/N, he does…He thought he’d never seen you again. He thought he lost you forever. I think that’s the only reason he tried to move on, but you can’t make yourself love someone else…Not in the way that you two love each other.”

“Iris…” You shut your eyes putting your hands on the counter.

She smiled at you, “If you two would just get passed the past I think you guys could conquer everything.”

“Iris stop!” You looked at her tears in your eyes, your face red. You shut your eyes taking in a deep breath, “I’m sorry…I didn’t…I didn’t mean to shout, but I can’t…I can’t do that to him. I don’t want to hurt him again and I can’t risk it.”

“But…”

“I have to go.” You started out of the kitchen, “I’ll drop Bandit off in the morning. Thank you for everything.”

Bandit whined as you grabbed your coat walking out the door with him. He continued to whine as walked down the road to your car, “I’ll be alright boy…”

He ran in front of you and barked up at you. You stared at him, “Bandit stop it, I said I’m fine.”

He barked again. This time it was deeper. You shook your head kneeling down to him, “What?”

He whined and licked your face. You started to cry as he continued the gentle task. You wrapped your arms around his neck, “Bandit…I don’t know what to do. She said what I wanted to hear, but why did it scare me so much…”

He responded with a low whine resting his head against your shoulder breathing steadily as you sat on the sidewalk with him long into the night.


	9. Race You to Midnight - 9

The next morning was rougher then you thought it would be. You didn’t really sleep much with everything rolling over in your mind. Grabbing an extra-large coffee from Jitters after you dropped off Bandit was the only way you were going to survive the day. You arrived early at the lab welcoming the silence of the moment.

You smiled a little to yourself looking around their hub. It wasn’t an awful set up, but it could definitely use some flair from your favorite tech girl Felicity. Maybe when you got back from ‘Earth 2’ you would give her a call for some ideas.

“You must be Y/N.” You turned around to face who was speaking to you. The other Harrison Wells. He stared at you flexing his hands at his sides.

“I am.” You smiled walking toward him hand outstretched, “We’re mounting this rescue for your daughter, correct?”

“Yes.” He took your hand and continued to stare at you. There was something about how he was looking at you that made you uneasy, “You’re special forces trained.”

“Something like that.” You glanced at your hands. He was still holding on to yours, “Are you trying to fit me for a glove?”

“Excuse me?” He felt you wiggle your fingers against his wrist, “I’m sorry…I’m a little eager to get home.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll get your daughter and take care of Zoom.” You told him.

“What do you know about him?” He asked you as he walked toward a computer.

“Not too much. He’s faster than Barry, creepy looking, and apparently has a thing for getting faster.” You told him, “Is there something else I should know?”

“He will do whatever it takes to get what he wants. The moment he sees fit to exact death, he will.” He looked at you, “Whatever it takes.”

“I understand.” You told him stepping over, “I think you need to understand that I will do everything and anything to protect Barry Allen. He wants to save your daughter, therefore I do. That being said…”

“He’s priority.” He looked away for a moment sighing, “Regardless…Thank you.”

You were surprised. Everyone had told you how cold he was. Perhaps he finally realized they were on his side, “Can I help you with anything?”

“No…I…I’m just waiting.” He told you watching you sit down next to him.

“Then maybe you can help me.” You smiled at him, “No doubt Barry and Cisco are going to be acting like tourist for the first hour…I want to be prepared. Where are we going to be entering? What should we expect to see that is so different from here?”

“Well…” He took a deep breath glancing at the clock, “I guess we do have some time…”

“Dr. Wells…” You reached forward putting a hand on his, “We’re going to win.”

“You sound so confident.” He stared into your eyes.

You smiled at him, “Barry told you about my skills…did he tell you my nickname I got from my unit?”

“No he did not. He only mentioned that you had Special Forces skills and that you went from military to private work.” He told you glancing at your hand on his, “It was enough to convince me.”

“They called me ‘Hound’.” You told him, “Like blood hound. I don’t drop something until I get all the answers or my man. Right now, your daughter is my target. I will find her, hopefully with your help. I promise, you will hold her in your arms again.”

He smiled glancing away as you moved your hand away. He wiped a hand over his face clearing his throat. He finally felt relief. When you spoke the words he believed them. Every one of them.

“Well…the first thing that’s different is the clothes.” He started to explain everything that he could to you. He even pulled up a map of Central City pointing out some obvious differences. You studied him while taking in all of the information he was giving you. You could tell he was studying you too.

“Hey! You’re here early.” You both looked over at Barry walking in with Cisco.

“I wanted to make sure I made it this time.” You smiled standing up receiving a hug from him, “It’s a good thing too. Dr. Wells has been filling me on some information of Earth-2.”

“Has he?” Cisco looked at him, “I’ve asked numerous times and he gave me zilch.”

“Well Ramon, you didn’t ask the right way.” Harry pushed off the desk, “Barry, I’ve finalized all of the devices.”

“Good, let’s get started then.” Barry looked to you, “I have to take care of some breaches before we go. You doing alright?”

“I’m fine.” You told him, “Go save the world.”

He smiled winking at you before he rushed away leaving you in a mess of emotions. Iris’ words were coming back to you “He loves you.”

You cleared your throat feeling yourself get dizzy. Quickly you turned on your heels heading for the hall, “1…”

You could feel Harry’s eyes on you as you clenched your fists, “2…3…”

“Y/N…” You heard Cisco call after you.

“4…5…” You crouched down when you couldn’t walk anymore, “6…7…8…9…10…”

After a long moment of silence you felt two strong hands plant themselves firmly on your shoulders. You looked up at Harry staring at you. He sighed, “What can I do?”

“There’s nothing you can do.” You told him shaking, “I just…need…a minute.”

He nodded watching you, “Are you sure you can do this?”

“Yes.” You told him without hesitation, “This…has nothing to do with the mission. It won’t be a problem any further.”

“How can you be so confident in that? Something that is so…unknown. Variables that you don’t know…” He told you, “But yourself…something that you live with every day…you have no confidence in at all.”

You looked away from him, “You don’t know me…you don’t know…”

“No I don’t know you like everyone else.” He interrupted quickly, “But what I’ve deducted in the last few hours is that you’re a strong, intelligent woman, and I’m finding it hard to believe that anything would put you in a state like this.”

You looked at him as he continued, “You’re stronger than this anxiety. You’re stronger then the situation. I have no doubt that you’ll conquer this.”

“How are so sure about that?” You asked him.

He smiled a little, “Because I am confident in you. In a variable that I don’t know or understand.”

You watched him walk away down the hall. Oddly, he made you feel better. You cleared your throat taking a moment longer to yourself before standing up. You walked back to the hub finding Cisco watching Barry close the breaches.

After assuring him that you were fine you helped him monitor Barry until Caitlin arrived with Jay. You stood off to the side with him watching them work, “So…that used to be you out in the field?”

He glanced at you, “Yeah…I guess.”

You looked at him, “Listen, Mr. Garrick.”

“Please call me Jay.” He turned facing you smiling.

“…” You stared at him for a moment, “Listen…I get funny feeling about you. Something off…I don’t trust you.”

He crossed his arms defensively, “W-what makes you say that?”

“Because you’re a liar Mr. Garrick.” You told him with a smile, “I suggest you figure that out before we return.”

You walked away from him as Caitlin and Cisco counted down the last few breaches Barry closed. Cisco smiled at you, “Only one left…doesn’t close until we get home.”

“Yeah…” Barry came in smiling as he pulled off his cowl, “With everyone.”

You smiled at him as he celebrated the small victory of the day. Finally everything calmed down and the mood shifted. You grabbed your pack feeling the shift in the air. It was time to go.

“Here let me take that for you.” Cisco offered holding out his hand.

“That’s ok.” You told him, “No offense I don’t want you holding my arsenal.”

“When you say…arsenal…” He glanced at the pack.

“You don’t want to know.” You smiled at him hooking the arm on your shoulder.

You watched Barry say goodbye to Joe and Iris. They were so worried for him. When he moved to talk to Jay about some last minute adjustments Joe walked over to you, “Y/N…”

“I’ll get him home.” You held out your hand to him.

He looked at it moving it away embracing you instead, “You need to get home too. Both of you.”

You smiled a little glancing over at Barry. He was smiling at you before looking back at what Jay was explaining. Joe let go of you patting you on the shoulder one last time. You cleared your throat walking over to Harry, “Ready to go.”

“Since I arrived.” He smiled down at you, “My home is truly…one of a kind.”

“From the way you described it, I have no doubt.” You smiled at him as Barry and Cisco joined them.

“Alright so…” Barry looked at you, “This is going to be a little awkward since I have to hold onto Harry and Cisco to push them through. I’m going to need you to hold onto me…”

You watched him turn around patting his shoulders, “You’re joking.”

“Come on, it’ll be like old times.” He smirked back looking at you, “All you have to do is hold on.”

You sighed, “If I fall off and get lost in some Star Trek universe…so help me…I will pew pew you when I get back.”

He laughed feeling you wrap your arms and legs around him tightly, “Alright…let’s do this.”

“Don’t get distracted…or emotionally invested.” Jay told them.

“What will we see?” Cisco glanced back at him as Barry grabbed his and Harry’s jacket.

“Everything.” Jay told him.

“You got me, right?” You whispered in Barry’s ear.

He smiled and nodded, “I got you.”

You heard him take a deep breath before lurching forward into the breach. It was hard to determine whether your eyes should shut or remain open. You saw yourself and your parents at high school graduation. Another glimpse was of you and Barry in front of a house together.

Finally you lurched to a halt falling from Barry’s back gagging and coughing at the same time. Barry turned around reaching down to you, “Are you okay?”

“Speed…bad…” You shook your head shutting your eyes, “Send me into battle and conflict….but roller-coasters…hergh…jets…”

He frowned a little but his eyes were smiling as he held your hair back just in case, “Sorry…”

“I…” You cleared your throat a little sitting up on your knees, “Whoo…I think I’m okay.”

“Just lean on me.” He smiled helping you up following Cisco and Harry out. Walking out with Barry you couldn’t help but smile at his enjoyment. You had to admit, Harry hadn’t done it justice.

Harry waved you all to follow him. You had to roll your eyes as Cisco and Barry got worse with every step into STAR labs. At the third picture Harry turned around irritated, “Ramon, not a sight-seeing tour.”

“Speak for yourself…” Cisco mumbled.

“Seriously guys…” You glanced back at them, “Focus.”

“Dr. Wells.” You all stopped looking over at a man walking forward, “We weren’t expecting you.”

You and Harry glanced back at Barry and Cisco gasping and tensing up. You gave them a weird look telling them to cool it. Harry sighed with a small smile, “I didn’t tell anyone I was coming.”

“Are…you’re friends alright?” The man looked at them with concern.

“Yes…they’re excitable…” He told him looking back at them, “This is um…”

“Henry Hewitt.” He smiled extending his hand to Barry and Cisco.

“Yes…I’m Barry… and this… is Cisco…” Barry stated awkwardly.

“Yes…I’m Cisco and you’re just…a normal guy.” He said shaking Henry’s hand.

“Yes…well…” he turned to you, “And you miss?”

You were about to answer when you felt Harry’s arm fall around your waist, “This is my girlfriend, Y/N.”


	10. Race You to Midnight - 10

You tensed for a brief second before smiling and playing along, “I thought we weren’t telling anyone.”

Harry smiled at you with warmth, “I don’t see what the harm is anymore. We’re not hiding.”

“Oh Dr. Wells.” Henry smiled at the both of you genuinely happy for the both of you, “That is wonderful, how did you meet?”

“Looking for my daughter. Y/N, heard my story and has been helping me ever since.” Harry told him, “She’s wonderful in every way.”

“I…Harrison…” You looked at him clearing your throat.

“Well, you’re obviously not here to talk to me. Will you be needing the conference room?” Henry asked quickly taking your silence for embarrassment.

“No, we won’t. Thank you.” Harry watched him walk away before looking back to you, “Sorry about that…”

“Girlfriend?” You smirked crossing your arms as you started to walk with him again.

“It’s seemed reasonable.” Harry smiled at you as he adjusted his strap on his bag.

Cisco glanced at the tight jawed Barry next to him, “Uh…Barry? You okay?”

“I’m fine.” He told him flexing his hands that he hadn’t realized had been clenched. His knuckles cracked as he wiggled them. He watched you talk to Harry, smile at Harry…what the hell? He took a deep breath in through his nose as they entered Harry’s office.

When he let it go out his mouth he made eye contact with you. You were frowning looking at him. He watched you move with grace over to him despite the heavy backpack you had on, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah…” He nodded slowly, “Just…doppelgangers and how advanced everything is.”

“I know. It’s pretty amazing.” You smiled at him putting a hand on his arm letting it trail down to his hand, “But we have to focus on finding Jesse and stopping Zoom.”

He smiled lacing his fingers with yours squeezing your hand. He looked up at the tv when he heard something vaguely familiar, “Hey…that’s me…”

“Yeah it is.” Cisco laughed a little eating a twizler.

He felt your hand leave his as you moved to take off your bag. He glanced at you for a moment as you set your bag on a nearby chair, “I think I have an idea…”

You felt wind against your back. You began to turn to ask a question, but faced someone entirely different and the same, “B…Barry?”

“What just happened!?” You watched this very different Barry begin to freak out before he noticed Harry.

Harry smiled a little as he went on about how much he enjoyed his work. It only took Harry a moment to distract the excitable Barry as your Barry caught a tazer shocking his doppelganger.

“Bartholomew Allen!” You hissed catching the poor man before he fell out of the chair.

“Whoa! Did you become evil!?” Cisco looked at Barry.

“No…I just knocked him out.” He showed Cisco the tazer, “See?”

You checked ‘Barry’ over making sure he was okay, “Why did you do that?”

“Because he’s going to take his place.” Harry looked at him, “It’s a good idea.”

“Thanks.” Barry stared him down his jaw tensing, “I can use CCPD’s resources to get a better idea where Zoom’s location is at.”

“Just be careful Barry…” Cisco told him as he watched him move to his doppelganger, “Jay warned us…”

“I’ll be fine.” Barry looked at you holding ‘Barry’ up, “Could…you help me undress him?”

“Nooooo…” You shook your head standing up waving your hand, “Mmm mmm, you’re on your own for that. You can play with yourself all you like, but I’ll have not part in it.”

“Come on…not like you have dreamed of having two of me around before.” Barry smirked at you watching you blush. He had been joking, but apparently you had not. His eyebrows shot up, “Have you?”

“Barry…focus.” Harry snapped at him walking over to help, “Y/N, if you wouldn’t mind grabbing my tablet. There’s a meta detection program that needs to be started, it will help us. It should be on the back table.”

“Of course.” You nodded walking off.

Barry looked at Harry as he began helping him with ‘Barry’. Harry looked at him, “What?”

“Girlfriend? She couldn’t just be a friend?” Barry whispered harshly.

“Jealous?” Harry smirked a little like a prey playing with its food.

“No.” Barry said quickly.

“Good…then you have nothing to worry about.” Harry tossed the jacket at him, “But if you were jealous, you should be worried. Even from the short time I spent with her this morning I know that she’s a catch. Strong, determined, loyal, and not afraid to jump dimensions.”

Barry stared at him as he took off his own jacket, “I’m not jealous.”

“You should be.” Harry stood up turning from, “Ramon, help him.”

Barry watched him walk over to you as you messed with the tablet. Harry took it turning it vertical as opposed to the horizontal you had it making it turn on automatically. Barry heard you laugh. Something he missed.

His face burned as he pulled off his shirt dressing in the other Barry’s clothes. Harry was right… and he hated to admit it.

He was jealous.


	11. Race You to Midnight - 11

You sat at Harry’s work bench cleaning your gun. Barry had been gone for a while now. You worried about him.

Cisco took a seat next to you watching you put the pieces together quickly, “What’s your fastest time?”

You smiled a little looking at him, “We don’t actually do that. It’s just a movie a gag to gain favor for the hero.”

“Oh.” He nodded slowly as he accessed the tablet in front of him.

You smirked leaning toward him whisper, “One minute. Apart and together.”

He smiled looking at you, “Can I see?”

“Sure.” You took a deep breath putting the gun back together impressing him easily.

“Can you teach me that?” He asked bright eyed.

“No.” You shook your head, “You’re a man of science Cisco. If you ever handled a gun it’s going to be a ray gun that you create and understand. Guns aren’t for everyone.”

“She’s right Ramon.” Harry walked over looking at you both, “When you create a weapon you’ll have more respect for it because you’ll understand it. Just putting a gun in your hand doesn’t make you respect it. Y/N, I’m sure trained extensively with one gun.”

“Right.” You smiled at Harry clicking a magazine into the stock.

He smiled for a moment before turning taking a deep breath, “Where is he?”

You watched him walk away as Cisco started making some comments that erupted into an argument. It seemed to happen a lot between the both of them. You looked down at the gun on the table glancing over at Harry again. You’d caught him staring at you and you weren’t sure what you thought about that.

You finally looked at him, “I’m sure he’s fine.”

“Do you really believe that?” He said dramatically waving an arm around the room.

“He’ll be back. I’m sure he got thrown for a moment when he saw Joe.” You defended Barry, “He’s not trained. It will take him a moment to adjust.”

“Fine…” He watched you stand up, “Where are you going?”

“To check on other Barry.” You told him, “He shouldn’t be left alone for that long.”

“He’ll be fine.” Harry told you as you walked toward the door.

“I’ll be the judge of that.” You told him walking out. You’d helped him bring ‘Barry’ down to his vault earlier after Barry had left. You walked over to the poor guy locked up to a shelving unit.

You knelt down smiling at his sleeping form. You reached up to his neck taking his pulse but jumped when he woke up suddenly, “Where am I? What’s going on?”

“Barry…Barry!” You touched both of his arms, “Please calm down.”

He blinked several times focusing on your face, “Y/N? Wh..what are you doing here?”

You looked at him surprised that he knew you, “What do you mean?”

“You’re supposed to be serving in Atlantis. Has something happened? Are you okay?” He moved clanking the cuffs against the bar, “Why am I locked up?”

“Barry…this is complicated.” You told him slowly, “I’m not your Y/N…”

“What?” He shook his head not understanding, “What are you saying?”

“I’m from a different universe.” You made a face hoping you weren’t breaking some rules, “I’ve come with my Barry Allen to stop Zoom and get Dr. Wells’ daughter back.”

“I don’t understand…” You could tell he was getting excited. You apologized before knocking him out again as gently as you could.

When you got back to Dr. Wells’ office you saw Barry standing there taking of the bow tie that he wore. He looked over at you. You could tell something was wrong, “Barry, what happened?”

He frowned taking a deep breath. He explained what happened at the Jitterbugs lounge with Joe and Iris. You shut your eyes knowing how much this was going to affect him.

“They don’t matter Barry!” Harry shouted at him, “They don’t exist for you!”

“They do exist!” Barry shouted back, “You don’t get it! This is real! They’re real and I have to be there for them. I’m going. I’m doing this!”

“Barry…Barry!” He shouted after him before looking to you, “He shouldn’t be meddling!”

“What do you want me to do? He just watched his father figure get hurt and the woman that he cares for is in pain.” You told him standing up, “When it comes to family Barry is always going to run toward them first.”

Harry stood there as you turned to Cisco to help him come up with a device to stop Ronnie and Caitlin’s doppelgangers, “It doesn’t mean he’s right.”

“Says the man who was going to steal Barry’s speed to save his daughter knowing full well that it wouldn’t matter.” You looked back at him, “You know if you succeeded Zoom would’ve just killed Jesse.”

Harry looked away from you, “We need to figure that device out.”

“So help us.” You told him, “Stop worrying about what Barry is doing and just help us.”

Cisco looked at you later, “I don’t have time to make another.”

You looked at him, “The one will have to do.”

He started to hand it to you, “Here, when Barry gets back you should help him.”

“Cisco…” You smiled at him, “I’ll help him in my own way. You know this piece better than anyone else. You should operate it.”

Barry flashed into the room sending papers in the air. He glanced at Harry getting a slight satisfaction in the irritated look on his face, “Do we have something?”

“Yeah.” Cisco nodded, “We do, we’re ready.”

“Good, Joe just died and Iris is on a warpath.” Barry told them looking down at you. He looked away for a brief moment. There was something more than just Joe’s death bothering him, “We need to go.”

“Right, I’m ready.” Cisco looked at him holding a case in his hands.

“Do you think you’ll need more then Cisco?” You looked a Barry, “Seems like this earth’s Barry knows me and knows I’m qualified.”

“Yeah, grab your gear.” He watched you grabbing a few weapons taking a deep breath.

You looked at him once you were ready, “Is everything alright? You’ve got a weird look that isn’t just about Joe…”

He nodded quickly, “Yeah…yeah…Let’s just go help Iris.”

You took a deep breath as he took hold of you and Cisco. Already you could feel your stomach twisting in knots. When he stopped outside the precinct you could feel him holding you up by the shoulders as you lost the contents of your stomach, “Nope…still don’t like that.”

“Are you going to be okay?” He helped you stand up.

“Yes.” You nodded wiping your mouth off, “Let’s go.”

You followed him and Cisco into the precinct. Everything was so grand looking. You couldn’t help but do a twirl to look around the room. It was beautiful.

It was Iris’ voice that brought you back to reality. You walked over to them getting her attention. She stared at you for a moment before embracing you tightly, “You’re here.”

“I…yeah…” You looked at Barry awkwardly as you hugged her back. You were never really close to Iris so to say this was unexpected was an understatement, “I heard…I’m so sorry…”

“I thought you were in Atlantis.” She sniffed pulling away to look at you.

“It’s complicated. I heard you might need some help.” You told her.

“I welcome it.” She nodded.

“Why does she get a pass but I don’t?” Cisco looked at Iris.

“Because she’s a Colonel for the Atlantean Military Force.” She told him. You made a surprised look nodding a little. You caught a small smile on Barry’s face before he turned to Iris tell him that he was coming with. She objected and reasonably so.

What happened next hurt more then you though it would. She kissed him. You had to turn away to shake off the feelings of jealousy. You felt Iris touch your arm to get your attention, “Let’s go get these guys.”

You nodded and glanced back at Barry. The look on his face was hard to read. Was he upset by something? You didn’t have time to ask him. You simply smiled giving him a thumbs up before boarding the elevator.

It would have to do until all this was over.

“So why are you here?” Iris asked you once on board.

“I can’t discuss it.” You looked at her, “Please don’t ask.”

“Really? You’re giving me the ‘don’t ask’ speech.” She looked at you hurt.

“Iris.” You looked at the doors, “I happened to be nearby…and heard the news about Joe…”

“So you just thought about coming to help? It’s not that I’m not grateful. You just said you were never coming back here.” Iris told you, “You’re not one to go against your word.”

“Like I said…” You looked at her, “It’s complicated and confidential.”

“What happened to you?” She asked making you look away, “Are things getting that bad?”

“Iris enough!” You snapped as the doors opened, “We need to focus.”

“Fine…”She walked out getting into her car, “You’re right.”


	12. Race You to Midnight - 12

Everything had gone straight to hell.

“Cisco I don’t think can keep going…” You told him struggling to walk even with his help.

“No no no, you don’t get to say that.” Cisco told you shifting more of your weight onto him, “We’re almost there. Harry and I will patch you up and then we’ll go save Barry.”

“Don’t make me laugh Cisco, it hurts.” You told him looking ahead at STAR Labs.

“That’s going to be hard because I’m the funny one of the group.” He told you, “I make everyone laugh. All the time…”

“Cisco…” You told him as you started slip a little.

“Right…focusing on getting you there.” He continued to talk as he helped you along.

It took about another twenty minutes to get there. Cisco entered the room first. You heard him cry out making you push off the wall gun raised as you crashed through the door, “Cisco!”

“Whoa!” Harry raised his hands, “Dammit Ramon, you didn’t…Y/N it’s me!”

You stared at Harry taking labored breaths, “Dammit…I could’ve killed you.”

“Thankfully you didn’t.” He told you as you lowered your gun. You couldn’t hold on any longer. Your gun dropped from your hand and you fell back against the wall as you held your side, “Y/N? What happened?”

You sunk down to the ground with both of their help, “Might’ve tangoed to close to the fireman, Elsa got a little jealous and decided to spear me.”

Harry lifted your shirt seeing a blood running down you side, “Shit…Uh…”

“There’s no time.” You said getting his attention, “I saw the signs on the way here. Zoom’s looking for you…”

“Not just me…he’s hunting all of us.” He put pressure on the wound making you grab onto him tightly, “We have to get to a hospital.”

“No time. Just get me something to wrap up with. Then we can go get Barry.” You told him.

“Where’s Barry?” He looked at you then to Cisco motioning him to come over and take his place.

“Zoom…has him.” Cisco told him as he put pressure on the wound.

Harry walked over getting a first aid kit. He wanted to say so many things, “We need to find him.”

“How?” Cisco looked at him as he knelt down next to you again.

Harry started to pull out some bandages and gauze, “I don’t know.”

“Hello!” You looked at Harry when a voice came from the other side of the room. Your hand went to his shoulder as he wrapped a bandage around you tightly as the voice continued, “We are going to have words when I get out of here!”

“Barry-2.” Cisco looked at him.

Harry finished looking at you, “This isn’t going to help it much.”

“But it will get me to Barry and Jesse.” You told him pushing against the wall to stand up. Cisco helped alleviate some of the strain.

Harry stared at you for a moment before grabbing his gun, “We need to pay a visit to a new friend.”

You nodded pushing off the wall to go with him making a face. It was a lot worse then you initially thought, not that you were going to tell them that. You followed them to where they put Barry and leaned against a shelving unit as he went on about how much trouble they were all in.

He stopped and looked over at you rubbing his wrists, “Y/N? Oh my god…what happened?”

“Not…your Y/N.” You told him when he came over to you.

“You need a hospital.” He looked you over ignoring your comment.

“Later, we need your help.” You told him putting a hand on his shoulder, “We’re friends here right?”

“Of course.” He nodded, “We’ve been friends since grade school.”

“Then trust me…” You looked him in the eye getting a nod from him. He helped you out following Harry and Cisco. You felt your teeth grinding as he started listing off all of the offenses they had done.

“I demand to know what the heck is going on!” He said after sitting you down in a chair.

You listened to them bicker amongst themselves with your eyes closed until the alarm sounded. They flashed open your heart pumping. Cisco and Barry were coming over to you. You raised a hand stopping them, “No…go. I’m just going to slow you down.”

“Y/N…Barry won’t forgive me if I don’t get you someplace safe.” Cisco told you.

“He’s right.” Barry nodded.

“Go…I’ll send him away.” You told them, “Just get someplace safe.”

“He will kill you.” Cisco whispered.

“Let me worry about that.” You smiled, “Go.”

“We have to go now.” Harry told them looking at you. You nodded to him as he started to leave.

“You fight him…” Cisco told you walking away with Barry, “You fight him tooth and nail.”

You smiled a little putting a hand to your side as they went from your view. You had no intention of going anywhere or fighting anyone tonight.

You looked to your left seeing a tablet. Perfect. You grabbed it standing up as you typed on it before you took a few steps falling down to the ground. You knew how to play dead, it was playing almost dead to get someone’s attention that was hard.

You laid there for a while until you felt the familiar woosh of a speedster. Your fingers reached for the tablet that had fallen away from you. You could hear him walking over to you like he was playing with his food, “No…”

He reached down picking up the tablet just out of your reach, “What have we here?”

You looked up at Zoom reading the note you fabricated. You finally saw how terrifying he was. You swallowed taking deep breaths as you tried to crawl away. You let out a loud cry when his foot pressed down against your wound.

“Where is Wells?” He reached down pulling you up to his face by holding your neck.

You held onto his wrist to balance yourself and take the pressure off your jaw, “…you… read the note…”

He stared at you with those dark pools, “What’s in Star City?”

“I don’t know…” You looked at him, “Not going to make it there to find out…”

He growled throwing you across the room into a desk sending its contents everywhere as you bounced against it. He sped over to you picking you up again, “Where is he?”

“I don’t know…” You weren’t lying, you didn’t know where they went, “If you’re going to kill me just do it.”

“That’s no fight…” He told you squeezing your throat make you gag, “You’re already dead.”

He dropped you before speeding away. You laid there pain overtaking your body. Your plan had only gotten this far in your head and you weren’t sure that he would have let you live. He wasn’t wrong. If you didn’t get help you were probably going to die.

You rolled over onto your stomach and started to crawl towards the phone that fell off the desk. Your vision started to blur. You couldn’t die…you still needed to get Jesse and Barry home.

“…Barr..y” You whispered your fingers touched the phone before you passed out.


	13. Race You to Midnight - 13

You opened your eyes hearing beeping noises sounding loudly. Where were you? How long were you out?

You started to get up groaning as nurses and doctors ran into the room telling you to lay back down. You grabbed a nurse’s arm, “I need to talk to Iris West…Iris Allen…Detective.”

“Ma’am, you have to lean back.”

“Detective West…” You repeated.

“We’ll get a hold of her.” They told you as you felt a sedative kicking in.

“You…have to…my name…Y/N…” You were losing focus.

“We know who you are Colonel…just relax.” The nurse eased you back further into to the bed as your eyes finally shut.

Barry looked at Cisco when they ended up back at the lab, “Where’s Y/N? You said she would be here. I just ran everywhere…she’s not here.”

Cisco looked at him, “I…she gave us a head start…”

Barry pulled his mask back, “A head start?”

“Barry…” He looked over at Harry, “We don’t have much time.”

“I’m not leaving her here.” Barry looked at him, “You didn’t leave me and she got caught because of me. It’s not happening.”

Harry glanced back at Jesse, “I’ll pull up the security footage.”

“Thank you.” Barry watched him got to a computer pulling it up. He glanced over at Iris and his doppelganger. He couldn’t help, but feel a little jealous. He’d always love Iris, maybe not in that way anymore. It was nice to know that he did end up with her somewhere in the worlds that existed.

“Barry.” He turned and walked over to Harry who was waving at him, “It looks like Zoom gave her a beating, but after he left security found her. They probably took her to a hospital.”

“Great where’s it located.” Barry started to pull up the mask.

Harry sighed, “We have three. It’s impossible to determine which…”

“Where are they?” Barry said raising his voice.

“She’s at St. Andrews. I just got the call.” Iris told him, “They have her in room 327.”

Barry wasted no time rushing over to the hospital. He only stopped by your bedside. You were attached to a few machines. His heart ached seeing you laying there unmoving aside from your steady intake of breath.

He wasn’t going to watch you die here too.

Gently and as quickly as he could he unattached everything and picked you up. He knew they were short for time and only hoped moving you wouldn’t cause you more discomfort or harm.

Everyone looked over as he stopped in the middle of the room holding you, “If we’re leaving we need to go now.”

“Is she okay?” Cisco ask grabbing his bag.

“I don’t know.” Barry frowned looking down at your sleeping form.

“She’ll be fine once we get her home.” Harry told him adjusting his bag.

“You really just expect me to drop everything here?” Jesse stopped looking at her father.

Barry couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Not because he didn’t understand. He did. This sucked for her, but he had a different matter to worry about. You. You were all that mattered right now.

After letting Iris and Barry-2 know that they needed to get themselves and their loved ones some place safe they said their good byes.

“Hey Barry…” He glanced back in the hall looking back at Iris. She glanced at you, “She’s not strong as she looks. Take care of her.”

Barry looked down at you nodding before speeding past everyone. He wanted to get you through first. He skidded through to the other side stopping, “Y/N’s hurt. She needs help.”

He passed you gently Joe and Iris. Joe looked at him “Where are the others?”

“They’re coming.” Barry turned rushing through to the other side grabbing Cisco and Jesse popping them through going back without hesitation.

Your body twitched getting Iris’ attention, “Dad…”

Joe turned as your eyes opened. You looked at both of them, “Joe? Iris?”

“Take it easy. Barry said you were hurt.” Joe knelt down looking at you.

“Barry…where is he?” You looked over at Cisco staring at the breach. Pain rushed through you as your tried to sit up, “Cisco…”

“It’s taking too long.” He mumbled.

“We’re going to have to close it.” Jay spoke quickly.

“No!” You looked at him, “Barry, will make it.”

He looked at you walking up to the pedestal trying to get the coke matter bomb, “We can’t risk it.”

“Stop!” You tried to stand but Joe beat you to it.

“You can’t just leave him there! Y/N’s right, Barry will make it.” Joe pointed at the breach, “It stays open.”

“We can’t…” Jay started but stopped when Barry and Wells fell through. Barry yelled for him to close it. The rest was a blur to you as you looked down to your side. Whatever correction that had been made was undone.

The last thing you heard was Caitlin screaming.

When you woke up again you recognized the surroundings. St. Andrews Hospital, you were almost sure it was the same room from your amnesia. You looked over to your side seeing Barry sitting with his head in his hands.

“Barry?” He looked at you and smiled.

“Hey.” He stood up taking your hand tightly in his, “How are you feeling?”

“Uh…rested actually.” You stared at him, “You don’t…”

“It’s been a rough couple of days.” He told you.

“How long have I been out?” You glanced down at your hands before looking at his face again.

He sighed, “Two days…Y/N…”

“What happened?” He tried to find the words until you squeezed his hand, “Barry, just say it.”

“…Jay’s dead.” You didn’t react. He wasn’t someone you knew, nor was he someone you had trusted.

“I’m sorry Barry…I know he helped you.” You told him slowly, “Is Caitlin alright?”

“She will be…which is another thing…” His thumb started rubbing circles on your hand, “Harry said it would be better if we didn’t tell anyone about what happened.”

“He’s probably right.” He looked to your eyes, “But knowing you and Cisco that won’t be easy.”

He smiled a little, “I just…don’t know how to act.”

“Barry,” You smiled at him putting your other hand over his, “just play it by ear. Do what feels right.”

He smiled, “You always know how to make me feel better.”

“Well boy wonder, you’re pretty easy to read.” You leaned back shutting your eyes.

“You okay?” You could see the frown lines from the tone of his voice.

You opened your eyes looking at him, “You don’t realize how much you use your side muscles when you talk.”

“I’ll let you rest.” He let your hand go making it feel cold, “But I’ll be back later.”

“I look forward to it.” You smiled watching him go. “Hey Barry…”

He stopped with his hand on the door frame, “Yeah?”

“I love you.” He was taken by surprise. You’d almost died in another universe. You didn’t want to miss out on another chance to tell him.

His mouth dropped open for a moment before he smiled, “I love you too, Y/N.”


	14. Race You to Midnight - 14

A few weeks passed and you were sitting in the lab looking at your personal laptop. You sighed scrolling through the job postings.

“Still nothing?” Cisco smirked a little.

“I just can’t see myself being a mall security guard.” You looked at him making a face.

“Yeah…I could understand that.” He made a face, “Chasing after pick pockets is far from international ops.”

“Yeah…” You smiled looking over as Barry walked in. You both hadn’t talked much since the hospital. You sighed looking away from him. Something didn’t feel right and you weren’t sure if it was because you told him that you loved him. Maybe he misinterpreted it.

“Going out for a run?” You heard Cisco ask him as you started to open up your email.

“Yeah. Figured I could see what’s going on.” Barry told him as he stared at the suit.

“Still avoiding Joe and Iris?” Cisco smirked a little.

“…maybe…still avoiding Caitlin?” Barry asked.

“Touché…I’ll man the coms?” Cisco said walking away from him.

“Sounds good.” Barry glanced over at you, “How’s the job hunt?”

You looked at him, “Oh we’re talking now?”

He sighed, “Yeah…look I know we haven’t…”

“Oh no…don’t group me into that. This is all you.” You told him, “You haven’t talked to me. Every time I’ve talked to you…you’ve had someplace to be.”

“Well I am busy…and I’m dealing with a lot.” He told you.

“Yeah…well so is everyone.” You told him, “You’re going to keep Cisco waiting…we can talk later…when you’re actually ready.”

He looked away from you zipping away once he was dressed in his suit. You sighed shutting your eyes. Of course it wasn’t going to be easy…maybe it just wasn’t meant to be.

“Y/N…” You opened your eyes seeing Harry standing in front of you. He was holding out a cup of warm coffee, “Thought you might need a pick me up.”

You smiled a little, “Thanks. How’s Jesse doing?”

He put his hands in his pockets standing in front of you, “About as well as a 17 year old can being forced to leave her home.”

“Did you like her ‘project’?” You took a sip as he sat down.

“Yeah.” He smiled looking at you, “She told me you helped set the room up. That was really nice.”

“Well I know what it’s like to be in strange situations, its little things like a colorful comforter that makes things a little easier.” You smiled at him.

He nodded slowly, “I hear you’re looking for a new job.”

“Yeah…sort of. I have a while. My severance doesn’t run out till the end of this year, but I figure if I start looking now, maybe I can get the training done before it’s up.” You told him, “But I doubt you came to find me to talk about my job hunting. What’s going on?”

“I…” He took a deep breath, “I was wondering if you’d like to have dinner with me?”

You swallowed the coffee in your mouth looking at him surprised, “Me?”

“There’s no one else here…” He stared at you for a moment, “This…was a bad idea…forget I asked.”

“No…no it’s not that.” You shut your laptop and leaned forward, “It’s just unexpected. I didn’t think…you saw me like that.”

“How could anyone not?” He smirked a little, “But…I know that there’s something between you and Barry. I don’t want to cause any trouble…Still I’d be a fool not ask.”

“I…well…” You sighed. It had been weeks. Barry had not reciprocated any feelings a side from telling you that he loved you in the hospital when emotions were high. You smiled, “Sure. Dinner would be great.”

“Really? I mean you do understand that it will be here…and I will be cooking…” He told you pointing at his face, “We haven’t figured out the whole shared face issue yet.”

“Yes I understand.” You nodded, “So…when?”

“Uh…tonight. 7 sound alright?” He stood up.

“Perfect, I’ll meet you here.” You smiled watching him walk away. That was unexpected. You laughed a little to yourself as you opened your laptop again.

Later Barry came back and walked over to you again as you packing up, “Hey…”

You looked at him, “Hi.”

“So I was wondering if we could grab a drink and talk.” He asked you slowly.

“Uh…I can’t tonight. I have a date. Maybe coffee in the morning?” You suggested.

“A…date?” He looked at you surprised shifting uneasily, “Really?”

“Yeah.” You nodded putting your bag on your shoulder, “So…coffee? Morning?”

“Uh…yeah…okay…Jitters?” He spoke slowly again.

“Sounds good, see you.” You smiled touching his arm as you walked past him. You had a date to get ready for and you were kind of excited for it.


	15. Race You to Midnight - 15

You sat at Jitters in the morning waiting for Barry staring into you coffee. Your date had been nice. Really nice actually. Harry had treated you to a nice homemade dinner.

You smiled thinking of all the conversation you both had, just talking about anything and everything. His work, your work, what you both intended to do now. It was nice. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d have such a good time.

“Hey.” You looked up at Barry sitting down, “Sorry…I had…”

“It’s fine.” You watched him rub his tired eyes, “Is everything alright? You look tired.”

“Yeah…I didn’t sleep real well.” He smiled at you, “How’d your date go?”

You smiled, “Really well actually.”

“Really?” There as an inflection in his tone that caught you off guard. Jealousy?

“Yeah, nice dinner and nice conversation.” You told him watching him carefully.

“Gonna go out again?” He smiled as the waitress put his coffee down.

“I don’t know. We didn’t talk about that.” You told him shrugging, “Maybe…probably talk to him later and find out.”

“Who is this guy? You never mentioned…anyone.” He took a sip of his coffee. You always enjoyed watching him embrace the warmth of that first sip.

“Harry.” You watched choke on the second sip.

“Harry…our Harry…” He looked at you his eyebrows coming together, “Seriously?”

You sat up straight, “Yes…why is that so surprising?”

“It’s Harry.” His gaze was hard and cold, “You barely know him.”

“Yes…well I feel like I’m barely know anyone lately.” You told him frowning, “And it was nice to feel wanted by someone for once.”

He looked away, “Is that what this is about? I was trying to explain yesterday…”

“Barry, I don’t want to fight with you.” You looked at him, “You asked me here because you wanted to talk…if what you’re hearing isn’t what you want to hear…then I’ll go.”

“No…just…” He took a deep breath setting his flat on the table, “I wanted to talk about that day…in hospital.”

You crossed your arms leaning back in the chair, “Okay…”

“But now…” His eyes shifted to yours, “I feel like it might be too late. Is it?”

“I don’t know.” You looked away taking a deep breath, “I don’t know, Barry. Back before Christmas with Savage…we both agreed that this was going to be different. That this wasn’t going to be easy, nor simple.”

He nodded looking into his coffee for a long moment before he spoke, “When I saw what Zoom…The beating you took. I was so afraid…so angry…Then I saw you at the hospital and I never…never wanted to see you like that again.”

You watched him get teary eyed, “Barry…”

“Y/N, for a long time…you were what I fought for. I was looking for metas to help them or stop them to keep you safe. I still feel that way.” He told you quickly, “I still…I still love you.”

You stared at him before taking a deep breath in, “Why didn’t you say something?”

“I didn’t know what to say and I realized that saying I love you at the hospital…I shouldn’t have…at least not then…” He frowned, “God this sucks…”

“Did you mean it?” You got his attention by the soft question.

“Yes…” He whispered staring into your eyes.

You looked down to your hands that rested in your lap now, “…Barry…I don’t know what to do about this…our situation…it’s a very long dance we’ve been having and I’m a little tired…”

He frowned as you went on, “I just…I…I need to figure all of this out and I think you do too.”

You stood up looking at him, “I’ll see you later, Barry.”

“Yeah…” He sat there watching you go. He sighed shutting his eyes once you were gone. He’d made a huge mistake. It reminded him of the all the times that you’d left him…but it was reversed. This time he’d left you to wonder. He was beginning to understand all the pain you must’ve went through while being apart from him.

He’d been a fool.

Once he finished his coffee he raced over to STAR Labs. He walked into the hub pausing as he saw Harry. He felt a little fire burn in his chest for a moment.

Harry looked over at him and genuinely smiled, “Good morning.”

“Morning…” Barry walked over to the coffee pot.

“You look like hell…” Harry told him.

“I’m feeling that way…” Barry nodded slowly, “Hey Harry…”

“Yes?” He looked at the young man staring at him.

“Be kind to her.” Barry frowned a little, “She’s not as strong as everyone thinks.”

Harry’s mouth dropped open a little before he nodded, “I will do my best.”

Barry nodded a little leaving it at that, “Have you seen Cisco? I wanted to talk to him about some things on the suit.”

Harry smiled a little, “I think he’s in his office, did you need help?”

“No…thanks…” Barry took another deep breath as he walked out trying to make this all feel right. He knew it was going to be a struggle…


	16. Race You to Midnight - 16

You smiled walking with Harry around STAR Labs with Bandit. As long as they kept around the building he wasn’t afraid of getting noticed, “She really just walked up there and corrected him?”

“Oh yeah.” He smiled looking at you, “My Jesse…she’s fearless.”

“Sounds like it. Wish I would’ve had her courage that that age.” You told him, “It took me until I was a junior to really start breaking out of my shell.”

“I have a hard time believing that.” He smiled at you.

“Yeah…well…we all grow from something don’t we?” You looked at him.

“I suppose we do.” He glanced at you.

You chuckled a little, “The point of this conversation was to let you know that your daughter is amazing.”

He smiled nodding, “I know.”

“Did you want more?” You looked over at a passing car, “Kids I mean.”

“My wife did…I wasn’t even sure I wanted any.” He told you, “Then Jesse came and my life changed. For the better of course. What about you? Kids in the cards for a strong woman like you?”

“I use to think so.” You told him smiling sadly, “Not anymore.”

“No?” He looked at you as you put your hands into your pockets.

“I can’t have any.” You looked at him smiling still. It seemed to be your defense mechanism to try and make it seem not so bad, “I was tortured during my first private contract. Beatings and electric shock does a lot of damage.”

“I’m sorry…” You could tell he felt like an idiot. Bandit began to whine at you licking your hand.

“Don’t be.” You told him petting Bandit’s head, “I don’t talk about it. There really isn’t a need to, but me having kids is out of the question. Maybe…if the time calls for it…I’ll adopt.”

He smiled a little, “That’s noble of you.”

You shrugged a little as you saw Barry walking out of the lab, “I guess…”

Harry looked over taking a deep breath, “This is awkward, isn’t it?”

“What?” You looked at him, “What do you mean?”

He smiled a little, “I have enjoyed the last few days with you, but it’s pretty obvious that you two…”

“Barry and I, aren’t…” You started to tell him.

“Y/N.” He smiled looking at you over his glasses, “Be honest with yourself.”

You sighed looking back over to Barry rushing off Bandit barking after him, “It’s not that simple anymore.”

“Do you love him?” He asked you like it was just that simple.

“Yes…I always will.” You told him crossing your arms, “That doesn’t mean I can’t love someone else.”

“I’m not saying that you can’t…but…” He looked away, “I’ve been where you are once. Torn…I chose to be with my wife even though things were harder. Things weren’t easy and it was the best choice I made.”

You smiled at him, “Harry…”

He leaned over kissing your cheek, “It’s just been nice talking with someone who isn’t second guessing me. I would like to continue the friendship.”

You sighed and nodded giving him a hug. You laughed a little sensing his surprise, “I anticipate many morning coffee walks in our future.”

“Good…”He finally relented hugging you back, “Now…I suggest getting in touch with our young speedster. I fear he may do something…stupid.”

You laughed as he walked back inside. You pulled out your phone. Harry glanced back at you as Jesse walked up to him. He looked at her putting his arm around her shoulders, “Hey kiddo.”

“Did you just get dumped?” Jesse looked up at him.

“No.” Harry looked at him, “It was mutual…”

She smirked at him, “Aww….dad…you got dumped. Do you need tissues and ice cream?”

“Get out of here…” He pushed her a little smiling as she took off down the hall.

Barry was running some tests for a basic case at CCPD when his phone went off. Shaking the vile with one hand he pulled out his phone looking at a text message from you.

_Meet me where we all began…_

He stared at the message thinking about what you meant. He sent a text back after a moment of thinking.

_At work. Don’t get out til later, that ok?_

_I’ll be there all night._

He sighed half tempted to write something along the lines of ‘no date with Harry?’, but he stopped himself. Being angry about it was going to do him any good. As he looked through the microscope he glanced at his phone on the desk.

Finally he couldn’t take it anymore.

_Is everything ok?_

He bit his thumb nervously waiting for the reply. If Harry did anything to you he was going to get super pissed.

_Yeah, I think everything’s working out._

He made a face, “What does that mean?”

“What does what mean?” He looked over at Iris walking in.

He stared at her, “I’m getting some pretty cryptic messages from Y/N…I’m not sure what to do…or really where to go.”

“Can I see?” He nodded handing the phone to her as he went back to the microscope. “Huh…where did you guys meet?”

“School.” He told her making some notes, “But…I don’t think it means that…”

“Well you tutored her didn’t you? Maybe she means her house.” Iris looked at him, “Or maybe where you two met when you reconnected.”

“I don’t think she’s going to be here all night do you?” Barry smirked a little.

“If it’s important enough, maybe.” Iris told him, “I was going to ask you to dinner, but it looks like you might have plans.”

Barry smiled a little, “No kid brother to pester?”

“He is busy with his school work.” She smiled at him, “I’m excited for him, he’s really getting into it.”

“That’s great.” He smiled at her, “I’m really happy that you’re all hitting it off. Maybe…he and I will get there eventually.”

She smiled a little kissing his cheek, “Text me what happens. I’m curious now.”

“Will do.” He smiled as she left. Your message rolled around in his head as he worked. He kept coming to four places…it wasn’t like he couldn’t get to all of them in a flash, but…why so cryptic?


	17. Race You to Midnight - 17 (The End)

Barry walked down the steps to the bullpen. He was here he might as well check to see if you were too. He took a deep breath walking into the offices looking around.

Joe stood there watching, “Bar? You alright?”

“Yeah.” He nodded looking at him, “Did you see Y/N around?”

“No.” Joe shook his head, “Was she supposed to be here? Is she alright?”

“Yeah no…everything’s fine.” Barry smiled a little, “She sent me a message…I’m supposed to meet her where we all began, but I’m not…exactly sure where that is.”

“Didn’t you guys meet in the third grade?” Joe smiled a little, “I vaguely remember Iris coming home telling me about it.”

Barry smiled, “Yeah…we met on the playground…”

Joe watched him stop, “Barry?”

“I have to go.” He hugged him tightly, “Thank you…I’m sorry…I…”

“Go.” Joe smiled at him as he ran to the elevator as he muttered, “About time…”

He raced over to the school playground. He stood on the side walk looking around. There were no lights, but he could hear a squeaking noise.

He smiled walking over to the swings standing next to Bandit laying on the ground watching you swing back and forth. After a moment he heard you, “I didn’t think you’d figure it out. I thought for sure you’d go to my house.”

“I admit I had to think about it.” He smiled watching you, “You jumped and landed on me.”

You came to a halt scrapping your feet on the ground, “I did not land on you…I landed near you as you tripped.”

“No.” He shook his head, “That is not true.”

“It is too.” You stood up stepping over to him.

“It is not! I clearly remember running and then-” His eyes got wide as you pulled him down by his shirt to you. It was the only way you knew to get him to slow down was to kiss him. When you pulled away he looked down at you, “…I…what about…”

“Didn’t work out.” You smiled at him straightening his jacket.

“Okay…” He smiled a little, “But what about…being tired of our dance…”

You sighed, “It’s just that…I’m tired of it. I want to rest, but I want to do it in your arms. Or however you’ll have me.”

He smiled looking down to the ground, “Y/N…I just…”

“Barry, we don’t have to jump into this.” You interrupted him, “That’s why…I brought you here…I want to start over.”

He looked back to you, “Start over?”

“Yeah.” You smiled holding out your hand to him, “I’m Y/N…I suck at keeping in contact, have done a lot of awful things, and enjoy hot chocolate with my sandwiches. I’m struggling with some anxiety and PTSD…and I think you’re incredibly handsome and would like to spend a whole bunch of time with you.”

He laughed a little taking your hand, “Barry…I’m always late to everything which is ironic because I’m the Flash, I like jalapenos on my pizza and I can eat four of them by myself. I’m dealing with a crazy speedster who wants to steal my speed and kill my family. I also find you extremely beautiful and would be happy to spend enormous amounts of time with you.”

You held onto his hand smiling, “It’s very nice to meet you…I should probably introduce you to my better half too.”

He tilted his head a little as you knelt down. Bandit walked over to you licking your face as Barry laughed, “Bandit this is Barry…he’s important to me. Barry…this is Bandit. He’s really smart and will probably knows the secrets to the universe.”

Barry smiled kneeling down holding out his hand, Bandit sniffed it before licking it, “Nice to meet you boy.”

You smiled at Barry, “Thank you for coming.”

He looked at you, “Y/N…I’ll always run towards you.”

You looked away for a moment, “…so…”

“Yes?” Barry looked at you. He couldn’t see you face in the dark, but he got this sense that you were happy. He loved it.

“Would…you like to come over for a drink? Or coffee?” You bit your lips together, “We can talk some more…get to know one another again.”

He smiled taking your hand in his, “I’d like that a lot.”

You both agreed to take the long way for Bandit’s sake. You weren’t sure if he could handle the speed force. Besides the walk to the car was nice.

Once you got home you walked inside. You hadn’t had a chance to change much yet. You had a few boxes laying around still. You walked with him to the kitchen, “You remember when the three of us would play hide and seek here?”

“Yes. You and Iris would gang up on me sometimes.” He said running a hand over the counter top as you put on a pot of coffee.

“God…” You sighed, “That was so long ago…”

“Yeah…” He watched you carefully, “Y/N…can I ask you something?”

“You know you can.” You smiled at him.

“I know I’ve asked it before…but it’s something that I still think about…” He stepped closer to you, “That day…you came to collect for Oliver…I asked you to stay…would you have?”

“Barry…” You frowned a little, “If I thought I had an option I would have.”

He nodded, “Joe…tried to explain…I was so angry I didn’t listen.”

“Bar…” You got his attention by taking his hands, “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I know.” He smiled, “It just seems like every time we ever get close like this…whenever we get to this point…I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

“When it does…we’ll face it together…I’ve got no ties anywhere at the moment.” You told him, “I’m looking for a job, but I’m pretty much blacklisted because of my PTSD. I’m just focusing on me and myself. Harry made helped me realize that I need to be a little more selfish.”

“Selfish?” Barry squinted tilting his head a little.

“Yeah…and to be honest with myself…” You touched his face smiling as he leaned into your hand. You leaned up on your toes and kissed him, “I love you Barry. I always have.”

He smiled looking at you, “I think I like selfish you.”

“Oh yeah?” You smirked a little as he wrapped his arms around you.

“Yeah…I get kissed more often.” He smiled swaying with you, “I like kissing.”

You laughed a little as he moved around the kitchen with you. He twirled you before drawing you closely back to him. He smiled and kissed you lightly “I love you too. I’m sorry it took me so long to really figure it out.”

You smiled at him as a chime sounded in the house. He looked over toward the noise. You moved his head back to you, “It’s the clock…it’s midnight. It’s a new day.”

“Fresh start.” He nudge your nose with his.


	18. Race You to Midnight - Snapshot-

**7 Years later**

You sat with Barry your leg shaking nervously up and down. You looked at him when you felt him take your hand in his lacing his fingers tightly with yours, “It’s going to be okay.”

You let out a breath through your mouth, “Barry…”

“What’s wrong?” He turned a little in his seat to look at you.

“What if…” You started.

“Y/N, we had this discussion in the car on the way over here…” He smiled squeezing you hand.

“But what if they don’t like me…” You frowned, “We’ve worked so hard to get here and what if they just hate me and they leave.”

“They’re not going to leave and they’re going to love you.” He leaned over kissing you cheek.

“You don’t know that.” You looked at him, “How are you so calm about this?”

“Because I know you.” He smiled reaching out touching your cheek with his warm hand, “Y/N, you’re going to be a great mom.”

**5 Years Ago…**

_“Barry…” Caitlin looked at the gorgeous ring Barry was showing them, “I’d marry you.”_

_Barry laughed, “I did good then, I take it?”_

_“Very good.” Caitlin smiled pulling him into a hug, “I’m so happy for you.”_

_“Thank you.” He smiled closing the ring box placing in his pocket._

_“So…” Cisco smiled at him, “When are you going to ask her?”_

_“Uh…tonight.” Barry smiled eagerly, “She said she had something to talk about with me. I’m hoping that it’s about her job and not something else.”_

_“Yeah how is the job going? Is she liking it?” Caitlin smiled walking with them toward the elevators, “I feel like sense she accepted the position we haven’t seen her.”_

_“It keeps her really busy, but I think she likes it. Training cadets for the FBI seemed like a good job.” He smiled pressing the button, “I mean she gets to order people around and yell at them when they fail.”_

_Cisco stared off into space, “I bet she’s really scary when she yells at you.”_

_“You have no idea.” Barry laughed a little patting him on the back._

_Cisco snapped out of it, “You have to text us afterwards…”_

_“Yes, photos or it didn’t happen.” Caitlin smiled at him._

_“Of course.” Barry stepped onto the elevator, “I’ll see you guys later…hopefully with good news.”_

_“Good luck!” He heard as the doors shut. The run home was longer the usual. Probably because he was so nervous._

_He’d moved into your home about six months ago. He was happy that the two of you were meshing well together and not killing one another. It’s what prompted him to by the ring. He loved you and he didn’t want to miss out on anything ever again._

_He whipped up a nice dinner before you got home and had everything set out when you walked through the door. He smiled walking over helping you take off your jacket, “Hey babe.”_

_“Hi.” You smiled shrugging it off then turned to him kissing him, “What smells so good?”_

_“Dinner.” He smiled down at you, “Why don’t you get cleaned up and I’ll meet you in the kitchen.”_

_“Aww…” You kissed him again before starting up the stairs, “What would I do without you?”_

_“Order take out.” He smirked hanging up your coat. He heard a huff from behind him. Turning slowly he saw Bandit staring at him, “I didn’t forget.”_

_He walked into the kitchen picking up the dog bowl filling it with water, “So pushy…here.”_

_Bandit rushed over lapping at the water. He stopped as Barry sighed leaning against the countertop. He walked over and nudged Barry’s hand whining a little. Barry smiled rubbing him between the ears, “I’m okay boy, just a little nervous. Got a big question to ask today.”_

_A while later you walked down and into the kitchen catching Barry pouring wine into a couple of glasses, “Oh it’s like you read my mind.”_

_He smiled as you sat down handing you the glass, “Got some greenies today, didn’t you?”_

_“Oh my yes I did.” You smiled taking a sip, “I think I got them scared. We’ll see who shows up tomorrow.”_

_He laughed a little watching you talk about the job as you filled up your plate. After you’d both finished up he felt the box in his pocket getting heavier. He took a deep breath looking at you, “So…I…wanted…”_

_“Barry…” He looked at you when you interrupted him, “I know what you’re about to do…”_

_His eyes lit up with surprise, “You…you do?”_

_“I was the best at what I did remember?” You told him getting a small smile, “Which… is why…”_

_You stopped taking a deep breath before continuing, “Which is why I need to tell you something important.”_

_He moved to the edge of his seat taking your hand in his, “Okay…what is it?”_

_“I know you want a family.” You started your eyes getting sad, “I would love to be a part of it…the way…you want me to be, but I can’t…”_

_You watched his expression changed from concerned to hurt as you went on, “It’s not that I don’t want to be because Barry I would say yes…I will always say yes…”_

_“I don’t…Y/N I don’t understand.” He stared at you getting more confused as he sat back in his seat crossing his arms._

_You shut your eyes a tear falling down your cheek, “You want a big family and I can’t give it to you…I can’t have children… because of what happened a long time ago…I got hurt…and we’ve never talked about kids or anything like that so I never thought to bring I up…But then I just…I knew you were going to ask … and Barry…Barry you deserve to be happy and have it all. I’ll understand…”_

_“Stop.” You froze looking at him as silence filled the room. He moved to the edge of his seat again taking your hands in his, “Y/N…I love you. I can see how much this hurts you…How much having kids meant to you…”_

_Your eyes shut as you looked down tears falling down your face as he continued, “Y/N, I want you. I want you by my side, with me forever and always…”_

_He lifted you chin before taking your face in his hands. His thumbs brushed the tears away as he smiled, “I love you…Will you marry me?”  
You nodded smiling, “Yes…Yes Barry…”_

_He smiled leaning forward kissing you. He laughed a littled resting his forehead against yours, “I wouldn’t have bought a ring if I knew it would be this easy.”_

**Present (7 years)**

You had started pacing after Barry had gotten a call from the precinct. They had given him more responsibility in the last year along with an office. The sound of the overhead speaker alerted you to the plane landing.

“Come on Barry…” You whispered looking toward the gate you were waiting at.

He came ‘running’ over, “I’m sorry…it won’t happen again. For the next three days I am right here…”

“It’s okay…” You nodded as his hands fell on your arms.

“Hey…” He smiled, “Deep breath, they’re almost here.”

“I know…” You took a deep breath and hugged him tightly, “I love you Barry.”

He smiled kissing the top of your head, “I love you too.”

“Mr. and Mrs. Allen?” You both looked over to an airport attendant smiling at them, “The captain sent word ahead and wanted to make sure you’re ready.”

“Yes.” Barry smiled, “Thank you, will they be the first off the plane?”

“No, they were sat near the back.” The attendant told them, “You know…government funding.”

“I do know.” Barry smiled, “Thank you again.”

“Of course.” They smiled before walking away, “Good luck, I’ll let the captain know you’re here.”

“Barry…” You looked at him feeling panic seep into you.

“Hey…hey…” He took your face in his hands kissing you, “We’ve got this. We’re doing this together.”

You took a deep breath nodding slowly, “Okay…alright…yes of course.”

You both looked over as people started filing off the plane. Your heart was thumping loudly in your ears as you watched families walk off. Fear was taking over you. Did you even know how to be a mother? Yours had left you too early…

Finally you saw a little girl walking off with a stewardess. You stepped forward tearing up, “Abigail?”

Her eyes lit up at the sound of her name as big smile grew on her face. She let go of the stewardess hand and started running forward her pig tails bouncing, “Mommy!”

Your heart pooled over with joy as you ran forward dropping to your knees taking her into your arms as she practically jumped to you, “Hi…oh my…I love you so much.”

“Dad?” You looked up at Barry embracing a young boy holding him tightly. Barry smiled big tears of happiness falling down his face.

“Yeah, Brandon…” Barry nodded as the boy clung to him, “You’re home.”

You stood up with Abigail in your arms reaching over to Brandon’s face when he looked at you, “Hi…”

“Mom…” He smiled at you hugging you tightly. You kissed his head holding him close.

“You’re squishing me!” Abigail said uncomfortably.

“Well we can’t have that.” Barry smiled wiping his face before taking her from you. She smiled at him as he hugged her tightly.

Brandon finally let you go. He looked up to your face, “What now?”

You smiled putting your hands to his face, “Now…now we go see the rest of your family at home. They’re all excited to meet you. All your aunts and uncles.”

“Uncle Cisco set up your rooms and Grandpa Joe and Iris cooked.” Barry said at they began to walk slowly, “Aunt Caitlin is just excited to see you and…”

You smiled as he went on walking with Brandon attached to you. You were never happier than this moment. You were finally where you belonged.


End file.
